Musings of an Old Chemist

A Chemist's Perspective on the Habits and Skills STEM Students Need For Success

  • Unlocking Your Personal Growth: Motivations and Expectations

    Throughout our lives, we are constantly asked, “What do you want to do?” “What are your goals?” and “What do you expect to achieve?” These aren’t just questions in a job interview or at a parent-teacher conference; they are at the heart of our motivations and expectations.

    Motivations: The Source of Your Personal Growth Blueprint

    Motivations are the “why” behind your work. Think of them as the desire that inspires you as the architect of your personal growth —the deep, personal reasons you to start your personal growth journey in the first place.

    Why do you wake up every morning and choose to work hard? Is it to solve a problem that fascinates you, to help others, for financial security, or to gain recognition? The reasons we tackle any task are our motivations. Knowing what truly motivates you is the difference between building a life that fulfills you and simply going through the motions. Without understanding your motivations, you risk creating a blueprint that someone else designed for you, leaving you feeling empty even after you’ve “finished” the job. Your motivations are your fuel. They provide the passion and perseverance necessary to overcome challenges and bring a vision to life.

    Intrinsic Motivation

    Intrinsic motivation is deeply personal and originates from within us. It is a dynamic force that drives us to participate in activities simply for the joy and satisfaction they bring. This type of motivation is closely tied to our dreams and aspirations. It is what pushes us to achieve personal goals, pursue our passions, and continuously work to improve ourselves. When you’re driven by what you truly want and value, not just other people’s demands, you feel in control and that you’re making your own choices.

    Extrinsic Motivation

    On the other hand, extrinsic motivation comes from outside influences and the rewards they offer. You do the activity not because you enjoy it, but because of what you’ll get from it, whether that’s something you can touch or something less tangible. These benefits could include things like grades, praise, recognition, money, or social status. While extrinsic motivation can be a useful tool for achieving specific goals, it is important to recognize that it can also have its limitations. If we completely rely on extrinsic motivation, not on our desires and expectations, it can leave us feeling unsatisfied, empty, even though we have achieved the benefits we were seeking.

    How They Relate to Each Other

    What really drives us comes from both intrinsic and extrinsic motivations. We might do things just because they make us feel good or because we’re curious (that’s intrinsic). Or, we might do things for external reasons, like getting a bonus or to get an “A” on a report card (that’s extrinsic). Usually, it’s a mix of both. Take getting a master’s degree, for instance, you might want the opportunity to learn and grow (intrinsic), but you may also think about the better job opportunities the degree provides and the more money you can make (extrinsic).

    Striking a balance between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation is often the key to achieving long-term success and happiness. While external rewards can provide a temporary boost, it is the internal drive and passion that sustains us over time. It is important to cultivate your intrinsic motivation by identifying activities that you genuinely enjoy and find meaningful. This may involve exploring our interests, discovering your passions, and setting personal goals that align with your values.

    To truly understand our motivations, we must also practice the art of self-reflection. This means asking yourself tough questions about what drives you, what rewards are you seeking, and if your motivations align with your fundamental values. As you grow, your motivations change, so it’s an ongoing process. You’ll need to regularly check if what drives you still aligns with your goals and helps you feel good overall.

    When we get to know ourselves better and understand what really motivates us, we can make smarter decisions, set goals that truly matter, and live a life that feels more deliberate and fulfilling. Just remember, real motivation comes from within, and that inner drive is what helps us reach our full potential.

    Expectations: The Specifications of Your Personal Growth Blueprint

    While motivations explain the “why,” expectations clarify the “what” and “how much,” serving as precise specifications on a blueprint. Expectations come from two sources: external expectations, which are standards set by others, like our parents’ expectations for us or a boss’s performance objectives, which represents what the world anticipates from you. Internal expectations, which are the standards you impose on yourself, such as desired grades, work quality, or personal values, representing the standards you uphold for yourself.

    As the architect of your personal growth, you must be keenly aware of both. You cannot build a solid structure without a clear plan. Your expectations provide the necessary direction and the measurable goals that turn your motivations into real actions.

    External Motivations

    Throughout our lives, external expectations are placed upon us by others. During childhood and our teenage years, these expectations primarily come from parents and teachers, who set standards for how well we do in school, our behavior, and how we act in social settings. As we enter adulthood, the sources of external expectations broaden to include employers, people we work with, friends, partners, and society in general. These can include a wide range of areas, such as our career success, being stable financially, our relationships, and meeting society’s expectations.

    It’s great to get guidance and motivation from others, but remember that what others expect isn’t always what we really want or value. Trying to make everyone happy can leave you feeling overwhelmed, not good enough, and like you’ve lost control. It’s important to figure out which external expectations are worth chasing and which ones you should politely pass on, always putting your own well-being and personal growth first.

    Internal Expectations

    Our internal expectations originate from our personal values, goals, and aspirations, reflecting our beliefs about our capabilities. These internal expectations span various aspects of life, including personal growth, career success, healthy living, our relationships, and our creative pursuits. While they can be a powerful motivator, driving us to excel, it’s vital that that our internal expectations remain realistic.

    Let’s be honest, most of us, myself included, have at some point in our lives created unrealistic expectations about how quickly we should be able to master something – studying for an exam, getting a promotion, completing a training course. Perhaps it’s “I expect to be paid ‘x’ number of dollars for working as a (fill in the blank) because they’re lucky to have me.” Or, “I shouldn’t have to start at the bottom and work my way up, because they’re lucky to have me.”

    Unattainable standards or expecting instant success can lead to frustration and a sense of failure. It is crucial to be patient with yourself, practice self-compassion, acknowledge that progress requires time and effort, remember to embrace a growth mindset, and celebrate minor achievements to keep motivated.

    How They Relate to Each Other

    What we expect from ourselves often comes from outside sources like what society tells us, educational standards, and seeing what other people have achieved. It’s important to know yourself and your aspirations, and consider just where these expectations come from. Do they actually fit with what we value and love, or are we just trying to please others and get their approval?

    How we feel about ourselves, our self-worth, and self-esteem really gets shaped by a combination of what we expect of ourselves and what others expect of us. When we meet or even go beyond those expectations, it feels great. But if we miss the mark, it can lead to feeling down, ashamed, or just not good enough.

    Remember that your value as a person isn’t tied to always meeting every expectation, whether it’s something we put on ourselves or something someone else expects. You’re growing and changing all the time, and hitting roadblocks or messing up is just part of the deal. By being kind to yourself, accepting who you are, and focusing on what truly drives you from the inside, you can build a strong sense of self-worth that will stick with you, no matter what others think or how much pressure we feel.

    The Role of Our Aspirations

    Knowing what you want, your aspirations, is key to setting your own expectations. When your expectations come from inside you, they lead to lasting happiness. But if they’re just based on what others think, that happiness won’t stick around. To find balance, make sure your goals match your aspirations, what you truly important to you. Be proud of what you achieve, even if no one else is cheering, and be kind to yourself when things don’t go as planned. Always put your values, passions, and goals first.

    Motivations, Expectations, and Your Blueprint for Personal Growth

    The true strength of motivations and expectations is how they interact with each other. Motivations provide vision and energy, while expectations offer the set of instructions on our blueprint for personal growth.

    Personal growth occurs when your internal motivations are in harmony with your chosen expectations. This alignment is key to truly designing your growth blueprint. For example, if you love helping people, you might volunteer or work in public service. Or, if you’re motivated to become an expert, you’ll naturally keep learning and improving your skills.

    Remember, in the end, life is not just about ticking off a bunch of external boxes on a to-do list. It’s about really understanding what drives you and then picking goals that help you build a life that feels truly meaningful and personal.

  • Weekly Quotation: July, 30, 2025: Random Acts of Kindness

    “Carry out a random act of kindness with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.”

    – Princess Diana

    It is very easy to get so caught up in our own lives. Spending time to cultivate relationships, work on our day-to-day interactions with others, or pausing for a simple act of kindness can seem to be an inefficient use of our time in a world of texts and emails, and rapid digital information. The constant rush of our “microwave society” leaves us with less perceived time for deliberate acts of empathy and compassion.

    Students juggle demanding class schedules, extracurricular activities, part-time jobs, and social lives. They are often genuinely stressed, tired, and mentally preoccupied. When overwhelmed, people tend to conserve their energy, and sometimes, basic courtesy can be overlooked in the rush.

    That being said, there are some easy ways to practice empathy and compassion every day:

    Be open and friendly to everyone you meet. Simple things like holding a door, offering to help them a task, or really listening to their ideas or opinions without judging can make a big difference. Holding a door for someone struggling, or offering a kind word to someone who looks down, can make a huge difference in a person’s day.

    When you see someone, whether you know them or not, start by saying “hello”. A warm greeting, with eye contact, and a real smile go a long way to make them feel important and noticed. And remember, it’s really easy to send rude texts, emails and other digital communication since you don’t see the other person face-to-face, so be mindful.

    Show others that you sincerely care about them. Don’t just ask “How are you?” out of habit. Actually listen to their answer without interrupting. And a sincere “thank you” always makes people feel appreciated. These small acts help build stronger connections and relationships.

    Be willing to share what you know If you’re good at something, maybe help a classmate out with a difficult concept or tutor them. It can really help them learn and stress less.

    And finally, always try to make someone’s day better and leave a positive impression with little, unexpected gestures. This could be anything from picking up some trash to leaving a nice note or giving a genuine compliment.

  • Navigating Expectations for Personal Growth

    Imagine trying to build a house, but everyone around you has a different blueprint for what it should look like. That’s often what personal growth feels like. Our parents, teachers, mentors, bosses – each brings their own blueprint, their own vision for our success. We often feel like our lives are a reaction to what others want from us. They tell us what we “should” do, what we “could” become, and what they “expect” from us. These figures in our lives have their own perspectives, their unique viewpoint, shaped by their experiences, beliefs, values, and career paths. For example, a parent’s perspective on your career might be shaped by their own experiences with financial matters or their view on traditional career opportunities. And their expectations for us often stem from their motivations (e.g., love, a desire for our success, ot perhaps their unfulfilled dreams, or their understanding of “what works”).

    Yet, the story of our success – or our struggle – isn’t decided solely by these external expectations. It’s profoundly shaped by the intricate connection between their perspective, our perception of that perspective, the expectations that emerge, and ultimately, our motivation to meet (or redefine) them. 

    Perception is how you interpret or make sense of what you see, hear, or experience. It’s your internal processing of information received. So, while your parent has a perspective on your career, your perception of their advice might be that it’s supportive, or controlling, or outdated, depending on your internal filters. It’s how you receive and understand something based on your unique emotional viewpoint.

    If we see these expectations as fair, supportive, and in line with our dreams, for example: “They care about me,” “This expectation is good for my growth.” We’re more likely to accept and respect them. This positive outlook can then really motivate us, inspiring us to work towards meeting those expectations and reaching shared goals. 

    On the flip side, if we see these expectations as unfair, unrealistic, or manipulative, for example:  “They’re being unfair,” “They don’t understand me”, our reaction can be totally different. Such a negative view can lead to feeling resentful, like we’re being controlled, and ultimately, a lack of motivation. In these cases, what started as an external push for our personal growth can turn into an emotional barrier, holding us back and making us feel unsatisfied. 

    Several other factors influence our ability to perceive, interpret, and respond to external expectations:

    Our self-perception, which includes our self-esteem, confidence, and past successes or failures, significantly filters these expectations. For instance, having low self-esteem can cause even positive expectations to feel like criticism or an unachievable burden.

    The timing and our stage of personal growth also play a crucial role. An expectation that might be welcomed at one point in life could be resented at another, depending on our maturity, the context, and other life circumstances.

    Finally, how expectations are communicated is crucial. A dictatorial approach (“You must do this my way,” or “Because I told you so.”) will be perceived very differently than a supportive conversation, drastically altering our reception of external expectations.

    This complex relationship between perspective, perception, expectation, and motivation is the very foundation upon which we build our future, layer by layer, brick by self-chosen brick. In a world full of blueprints laid out by others, understanding how these four elements collide within us is the secret to becoming the true architect of our personal growth building.

    Personal Commentary

    A common theme that I heard during the time I was tutoring students, and even from my grandchildren when talking with them about their classes, was their perception of their teachers and their teacher’s expectations for them.. It seemed that if their teacher’s expectations required them to follow strict guidelines as far as classroom behavior, no talking or no cell phones, for example, or the timely submission of homework to receive full credit, then the teacher was being “mean.” And, I imagine the same concept applied when our parents said we had a certain curfew and they held us accountable when we were home late; were they being “mean”? If we had a brother or sister who got to do something that we weren’t allowed to do because they were older or there were special circumstances were our parents being “mean” then as well? And as we become adults and enter the workforce, if we submit a request for certain vacation days and our supervisor denies it for whatever reason, are they just being”mean”? 

    How we perceive situations that don’t go our way, or there are expectations for us that we disagree with, whether it is for our behavior or our performance, as a son or daughter, as a student in the classroom, or the workplace, is critical to our success in life. 

    I never struggled when it came to my perception of what my parents or my teachers expected of me. It was a combination of respect and fear as it pertained to my parents; I could not bear to disappoint them for fear of the consequences. I spent most of my life trying to meet the expectations of others. It’s only in the later years of my career when I admit my arrogance and sense of self-importance led me to question or rebel against the expectations of others above me. Never perceiving them as being “mean”, but simply that their expectations and requirements did not apply when it came to me, which is even worse. 

    So if you’ll allow me to make the following observation based upon my years of experience, my successes, and my failures. When dealing with someone’s expectations for you, regardless of the circumstances, see it as an opportunity for growth. Before you react, ask yourself why these expectations exist, and how you can utilize the situation to make you better, as a student, an employee, or as a son or daughter. You are the architect of your personal growth and only you are responsible for creating your blueprint for success.

  • Weekly Quotation: July, 23rd, 2025: The Choice We Need to Make

    For your consideration:

    “We are still in the position of waking up and having a choice. Do I make the world better today somehow, or do I not bother?”

    – Tom Hanks

    We are the architects of our own personal growth, and only we can determine what kind of person we will become. How will you define what personal success looks like? What do you desire? What is your true reward? Is it a high paying position or personal recognition, or is it becoming a person of value who makes those around you better?

  • Becoming Your Own Personal Growth Architect

    Your Role as an Architect in Your Personal Growth

    You’re building your personal growth building, and you’re the architect. This “architect” is your guide, turning your dreams into a clear vision of what you want to achieve. You acting as your personal growth architect will create a “blueprint” for your development, showing you the structure and key parts of your metaphorical building. Making sure your goals are solid and well defined, explaining how your dreams and goals create a strong foundation for your motivation and expectations, which then helps you move forward.

    But this role of an architect isn’t just about getting things done; it also focuses on how you experience your journey. It ensures everything lines up with who you want to be, both personally and publicly, making your whole growth process real and rewarding. As you start putting your plans into action, this architect offers a blueprint to follow, providing guidance, keeping you on track, helping you adjust, and making sure everything fits with your overall strategy.

    Ultimately, your growth blueprint helps you be clear on your vision, create a smart plan, connect different parts of your development, and finally build the life you imagine. Your growth architect could be your inner self, or a mentor, a coach, or even a structured way of thinking about yourself and your future. Regardless of who assumes the role of your personal growth architect, the blueprint design process begins with self-awareness.

    The Role of Self-awareness

    The most significant component in designing your blueprint for personal growth is self-awareness. It is the prerequisite—our knowledge of who we are and what we desire—on which our blueprint is based.

    Self-awareness can be a complex idea, but consider it this way: I know I want to grow a vegetable garden (self-awareness), versus with my role as an architect on this project, which involves the actual design (blueprint), selecting the plants, and determining their care.

    Self-awareness allows me to understand what I want to do and why I want to do it, my dreams, aspirations, goals, motivations, and expectations. In this particular example, it involves asking: Why do I want a garden? Why is it important to me? What do I expect it to look like? How soon do I want it ready? Once this groundwork is complete, only then can I take on the role of the architect and prepare a blueprint.

    Personal Commentary

    My Dad was a civil engineer. Where an architect works with people wanting to design their new home or businesses wanting to design new office space, my Dad would meet with developers planning new subdivisions, turning their ideas into detailed blueprints for streets, utilities, and home lots. Then, with a survey crew, he’d mark out key locations precisely, giving construction crews exact points to build from. His careful supervision continued until the project was complete.

    I still remember spending Saturday and Sunday afternoons helping my Dad in the field, measuring distances between property lines, new home foundations, utility lines, and easements. I really liked the work, so much so that during college summers, I’d join a survey crew for the Kentucky State Department of Highways, where my Dad was the District Engineer. It allowed me to use the math and physics concepts that I enjoyed from college. Why I didn’t follow in my Dad’s footsteps and become a civil engineer, I don’t know. I guess, like all of us, I needed to find my own path in life.

    I wish I had learned to create a clear blueprint for my life’s dreams and aspirations—something with defined goals and objectives, ways to track my progress, and built-in accountability. Back in college, some of my friends were way ahead of me on this. One good friend, who’s a doctor now, followed in his Dad’s footsteps. He showed up at Centre with a complete and detailed academic plan, knowing exactly which classes he needed for medical school and how hard he’d have to work to achieve the grades he wanted. He even found friends who shared his views to team up with, keeping each other accountable and supporting one another through tough times.

    Looking back, I spent my years throughout high school and my freshman year at Centre unsure of my direction. It wasn’t until my sophomore year, when I met Dr. Walkup, that I found a true mentor. He guided me, set clear expectations for success, and, crucially, held me accountable. Forty-five years later, in my late 60’s, I’d like to believe I know what I’m doing, but sometimes I still have my doubts. Even now, I find myself still searching for a blueprint on how to be the best father, grandfather, husband, and person I can be.

  • Self-Awareness: Your Internal GPS for Personal Growth

    So, we have this incredible building of personal growth, with its strong foundation and aspiring capstone. But how do we know we’re heading in the right direction? That’s where self-awareness, our internal “GPS” comes in.. It helps us pinpoint where we are right now and where we truly want to go. And once we have that clarity, we can then step into an even more powerful role: that of our architect, consciously designing and constructing the path to that very destination we desire.

    Think about your favorite video game or an elaborate set of LEGO™  building blocks. Before you can build something amazing or conquer a level, you need to know the rules, the tools you have, and where you want to go, right? Well, the same goes for growing as a person! Self-awareness is like having your internal map and knowing yourself really well – your strengths, your feelings, and what you truly care about. Understanding yourself is the first step to designing the kind of person you want to become and the life you want to build.

    Now imagine you’re the architect of your personal growth building. You get to design who you want to be and what you want to achieve. But just like any good architect, you need to know your materials and have a clear vision, a good set of blueprints. That is the role of self-awareness. Self-awareness is the process of getting to know your values, your skills, and what sparks your interest. It’s the foundation for making smart choices and building a future that’s uniquely yours.

    And just like a GPS helps you navigate physical terrain, self-awareness helps you navigate your personal landscape. Self-awareness is like your inner moral compass, helping you make choices that truly align with your gut feelings and what you value most. It’s about figuring out what truly matters to you, ensuring that your actions reflect who you genuinely are. This inner guide also helps you set goals based on your dreams and aspirations, turning them into clear “checkpoints” on your life’s journey. 

    Also, self-awareness, acting as your internal GPS, lets you see how far you’ve come, and how much further you have to go, giving you clarity on your journey and chances to celebrate all your wins, big or small. Life isn’t usually a straight line; it’s more like a complex roadmap with twists, turns, and unexpected detours. In this ever-changing landscape, self-awareness is beneficial. By regularly thinking about your experiences, changing values, and goals, it lets you adjust your “direction” when you need to. This ability to make important course corrections keeps you aligned with your evolving self, leading to a deeper understanding of who you’re becoming.

    Plus, this metaphorical GPS can show you different ways to reach your goals, giving you practical ideas about how long it might take and how much effort you’ll need. It encourages flexibility, helping you gracefully handle unexpected challenges and changes. When you inevitably feel “lost” or unsure, self-awareness shines a light on where you are in your journey. It not only shows you how far you’ve come but also reminds you of your inner strength and all the amazing progress you’ve made.  Recognizing where we are on our personal map, even when feeling disoriented, can be immensely reassuring. It helps us appreciate the progress we’ve made, recalibrate our direction when needed, and refuel our motivation to continue our journey.

    Ultimately, self-awareness is key to appreciating your ongoing progress, adjusting your course when things go off track, and boosting your motivation, pushing you forward with a fresh and clear sense of purpose. 

    How to Cultivate Your Self-awareness

    Self-awareness is a skill that, like a musical talent, such as playing the piano or the guitar, can be significantly improved through consistent effort, or practice, combined with specific techniques and activities. While you may already have a natural ability for playing an instrument or in the case of self-awareness, introspection or reflection, these are skills must still be developed. For self-awareness is an ongoing journey of discovery, where your investment of your time in mastering the following techniques along with a willingness to explore your inner self can lead to your significant growth as a person.

    This growth goes beyond understanding your strengths and weaknesses; it involves a deeper understanding of your emotions, thoughts, values, and motivations. It requires observing how these shape our behaviors and how we react to the world around us. Consider it like possessing an internal GPS system that continuously calibrates and refines its accuracy. Our constantly evolving and improving inner compass helps us navigate life’s obstacles, make well-informed choices, and encourage more honest relationships.

    To develop your self-awareness, consider these three components: an honest self-assessment, journaling, and seeking feedback from trusted peers (parents, mentors, teachers, and close friends). Each offers a distinct perspective on your inner workings, revealing valuable insights into your patterns and tendencies. The consistent commitment to these practices sharpens your awareness of your inner self, helping you to understand and control your emotions, improve your decision-making, and provide a clearer sense of purpose. Ultimately, self-awareness is a continuous journey of growth, changing as we mature and experience new things.

    The best place to start to grow your self-awareness is with a comprehensive self-assessment that encourages you to think about your:

    • Dreams and Aspirations: What is your long-term vision? What impact do you want to make in the world? What kind of future do you imagine for yourself?
    • Goals: What specific goals are you working towards in your academic and personal lives?
    • Strengths: What are you naturally good at? What skills and talents come easily to you? What do others praise you for?
    • Weaknesses (or Areas for Growth): Where do you struggle? What skills need development? What habits might be holding you back?

    This initial self-assessment provides a valuable foundation for building self-awareness. It helps you understand your internal compass and identify areas where you want to focus your energy.

    Next, I encourage you to keep a personal journal or even a private blog where you reflect on what you are learning in your courses, interactions with others, and daily activities, plus the challenges you are facing and how you are overcoming them. Journaling provides you an opportunity to:

    • Map  Your Progress: Regularly writing down your experiences, thoughts, and feelings related to your goals allows you to track how far you’ve come and identify patterns in your progress.
    • Reflect on Your Struggles: Journaling provides a safe space to explore challenges, frustrations, and setbacks. By writing about these difficulties, you can gain clarity, identify potential solutions, and learn from your experiences. 
    • Deepen Your Understanding of Who You Are: The act of writing forces you to express your thoughts and emotions, leading to a deeper understanding of your motivations, expectation and how you react in different situations.
    • Identify Patterns: Over time, journaling can reveal recurring patterns in your thoughts, behaviors, and emotional responses, offering valuable insights into your personality and habits. Journaling encourages you to explore and define your core values through self-reflection. 

    With practice, you will learn to spend time in deliberate  reflection, asking yourself questions such as: How did I feel today and why?, Why did I react that way in that situation and what can I learn from it?, What can I do differently given the same situation?, What are my core values and are they changing?, What are my current goals and why are they important to me?

    Finally, learn to ask others for their feedback on your progress, your actions and behavior, keeping an open mind and without getting defensive. I suggest asking trusted friends, family, or mentors for constructive feedback on how you come across to others. And while this can be challenging, it provides valuable perspective. More importantly, your willingness to reflect on this feedback objectively and identify patterns or areas where you can grow is a beneficial component of your personal growth.

    As a STEM student, this combination of activities can be particularly effective. You should appreciate the logical and scientific approach, a self-assessment followed by consistent journaling provides the framework for self-awareness. And, journaling can be seen as a way to collect “data” about yourself, which you can then analyze for insights and trends. This aligns with the analytical mindset you’ll need for success in the STEM fields. And finally, this process has its focus on growth and Improvement. It naturally encourages a growth mindset by prompting you to identify areas for improvement and track your development over time.

    In conclusion, do not forget that self-awareness is a continuous process, not a one-time activity. Practice it daily. Connect it to your goals. Remember self-awareness is a great tool to help you succeed in your studies, your future careers, and all areas of your life. Ultimately, self-awareness is the key to appreciating your ongoing progress, adjusting your course when things go off track, and boosting your motivation, pushing you forward with a fresh and clear sense of purpose. 

  • My passion: a hybrid aster growing in my Shepherdsville, Kentucky perennial bed

    The Key Components Of Personal Growth

    Personal growth is a journey. It’s about learning who you are, understanding what’s important to you, and how you change/evolve as a person over time. It’s about striving to become the best version of yourself. While personal growth is a very complex topic, for the sake of this discussion, we will break it down into two major categories: inner growth (dreams, aspirations, goals) and outer growth (acquiring knowledge, learning skills, developing personal relationships). 

    The best way that I can describe it, is to imagine personal growth as a house (see figure above). Inner growth consists of the foundation of the house and the supporting walls, while outer growth represents what’s called the capstone, the roof of the building. The stability of this metaphorical building, what we can achieve (outer growth), depends on the strength our inner growth providing with its foundation and support.

    What is Inner Growth?

    Inner growth is strictly about you, and everyone’s journey looks different. Don’t get caught up comparing yourself to others, since everyone’s got their own way of doing things. Inner growth is not simply about grades, awards, or recognition. Instead, put your focus on learning about yourself and developing your own, individual strength of character, seeking inner peace and feeling good about who you are as a person.

    Inner growth is getting better at understanding your emotions, handling tough times, and knowing yourself really well. You’ve got to take the time to figure out your thoughts, feelings, what you’re good at, where you’re not so good, and what drives you. By taking the time recognizing these things, you can pinpoint what’s really important to you, learning to deal with times when you’re stressed, and getting better at shaking off disappointments. At the end of the day, this inner work builds your confidence and gives you a real sense of direction, which sets you up for personal success.

    The 3 Layers of the Inner Growth Foundation

    Dreams

    Dreams, the base layer of our personal growth “foundation”, are fueled by our imagination,  constantly pushing us toward a future that that we believe is better than our current situation. They encompass our hopes and desires, motivating us to strive for ambitious goals. Our dreams focus on emotional fulfillment, what will make us feel “good” or an ideal outcome rather than how practical it is to achieve it. Our dreams evolve as we age, shaped by our experiences and perspectives. As children, we might dream of material possessions like toys; as we grow older, our dreams may shift towards education, career, and personal achievements – we may desire a dream job for example. In our later years, our dreams may center around retirement plans and leisure activities. Regardless of our age, dreams remain a driving force, moving us forward and inspiring us to reach our full potential.

    Aspirations

    Aspirations serve as a bridge between our dreams and real life. They are more practical than dreams because they are grounded in reality, taking into account our talents and abilities, our available resources, and the limits of our situation. While your dreams may often feel distant and unattainable, aspirations are achievable within a specific, realistic timeframe.

    Aspirations involve breaking down our grand visions and dreams into smaller, more manageable tasks and goals, providing a clear, more manageable path toward our desired outcomes.

    Similar to dreams, aspirations are not set in stone; they are flexible and adaptable. As we age, our abilities and skills progress and circumstances change, our aspirations can be adjusted and redirected to achieve our evolving goals and priorities. However, unlike dreams, which can sometimes be vague and undefined, aspirations focus on specific objectives, providing us with a sense of direction and purpose.

    The process of setting and pursuing aspirations involves self-reflection and self-awareness. It requires us to assess our strengths and weaknesses, identify our values and passions, and understand our limitations. By setting realistic and achievable aspirations, we can create a sense of motivation and momentum, propelling us forward on our journey toward personal and professional success.

    Goals

    Essentially, goals act like a guide to achieving what you want. They turn big dreams and aspirations into things you can actually work on. By creating specific goals, you get clear steps and ways to see how you’re doing. This not only helps you reach your targets but also keeps you excited and on track.

    “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.”

    African Proverb

    Once you have established a particular goal, the next step is to break down the process of achieving that goal into actionable steps or tasks. This is how we actually get things done. They’re the plan we use to turn our goals into reality.

    These steps tell us what to do and help us see how far we’ve come. Each completed step feels like a win and keeps us going. Plus, we can change things up as we go, adapting to whatever happens.

    Adding these steps to our goals means we’re not just dreaming, we’re doing. We feel more in control and less overwhelmed. Basically, actionable steps are what pushes us to succeed, turning ideas into real results.

    The Columns: Motivations and Expectations

    Motivations

    The reasons we take on any task are our motivations. They represent the underlying “why” that propels us towards our desired outcomes. Our motivations can be broken down into two categories: intrinsic, coming from from internal factors like a need to feel good about ourselves or our natural curiosity, or extrinsic, arising from external factors like our financial needs, a search for personal recognition or rewards, or social pressure. In many cases, our motivations are a blend of both. For instance, your decision to attend graduate school and pursue a master degree could be motivated by your desire for personal growth or a passion for learning (intrinsic), or the requirements of your career path, better job options, and higher earnings (extrinsic). Or perhaps a combination of both.

    Understanding our motivations requires us to recognize the importance and the need to practice self-awareness. Self-awareness involves honestly asking ourselves what is it that truly drives us, what rewards we seek, and whether our motivations coincide with what type of person we want to be known as. It is an ongoing process, as our motivations can evolve and shift depending on our circumstances. It is crucial for us to regularly evaluate our motivations in light of our aspirations and goals, ensuring that they remain aligned and supportive of our chosen path and overall personal well-being.

    By cultivating self-awareness and understanding our motivations, we can make more informed decisions, set meaningful goals, and live a more purposeful and fulfilling life. Remember, true motivation comes from within us, and it is our internal drive that ultimately propels us towards our greatest potential.

    Expectations

    Expectations also play a pivotal role in shaping our lives, influencing our decisions, actions, and overall well-being. Like our motivations, our expectations can be broadly classified into two main categories: external and internal.

    Both internal and external expectations play a significant role in shaping our self-worth and self-esteem. When we meet or exceed these expectations, we experience a sense of accomplishment and pride. However, when we fall short, we may feel disappointed, ashamed, or inadequate. It is essential to remember that our worth is not dependent on meeting all expectations, whether they are extrinsic, someone else’s expectations for us (such as those from parents, teachers, or friends) or intrinsic, expectations we impose on ourselves. We are all works in progress, and setbacks and failures are an inevitable part of our journey of personal growth. By practicing self-acceptance – understanding we are not perfect, being patient and compassionate with ourselves, and focusing on our internal motivations, we can develop a sense of self-worth that is not easily swayed by trying to please others or non-realistic expectations we may hold for ourselves.

    Personal Commentary

    Let’s be honest, most of us, myself included, have at some point in our lives created unrealistic expectations about how quickly we should be able to accomplish something – studying for an exam, getting a promotion, completing a training course. Perhaps it’s “I expect to be paid ‘x’ number of dollars for working as a (fill in the blank) because they’re lucky to have me.” Or, “I shouldn’t have to start at the bottom and work my way up, because they’re lucky to have me.”

    Growing up I put all my effort into meeting the expectation of others, especially my parents, while neglecting the other supporting components of the personal growth building . My dream to attend medical school and become a doctor was totally based on my parents expectations. I never had anyone talk with me about aspirations or how to set and act on goals. My motivations were entirely external, again meeting my parents expectations. Everything I accomplished – science fair awards, winning speech contest entries, and my Eagle Scout award was to please my parents.And it all came crashing down for me when I left home for college.

    The first semester of my freshman year at college I had two science courses, PS 11, Introduction to Physics with a Lab and Organic 1. Due to my sheer arrogance, being extremely overconfident in my knowledge of the subjects, my lack of study skills and having never written a research paper in my life, I received a “D” in both classes. My accumulative grade point average for the semester was a 2.0. All my dreams of attending medical school, meeting my parent’s expectations were flushed down the proverbial toilet. My sense of self worth, again based on pleasing my parents, was severely shaken. I lost all my self-confidence and considered not going back to college for the winter semester.

    Now I’m not saying that trying to meet your parent’s expectations is a bad thing, but it should only be part of your makeup, everything needs to be in balance, I should have developed internal motivations, understanding what truly made me happy, recognizing where my passions truly were and acting on them. Building on those passions a sense of self-worth that could not be shaken even when faced with adversity.

    The Roof: Outer Growth

    Think of the roof of your personal growth building,outer growth, like the tip of an iceberg, with all your hard work hidden beneath the surface. It’s the payoff for all the time you’ve spent learning, practicing self-awareness, sharpening your skills, and solidifying your beliefs. Every win, whether it’s success in the classroom, your college or graduate degree, a job promotion, your contributions to a community project, or taking care of yourself by forming a healthy habits, is clear proof of the significant inner growth happening.

    Plus, the positive impact you make goes beyond your personal wins, creating a ripple effect on those around you, your classmates, your coworkers, and the broader community. This could be through mentoring fellow classmates, your leadership in the classroom, in athletics, or your workplace, by giving back to others less fortunate than you, or just inspiring others with how you live. The consistent behaviors you adopt, like discipline, resilience, empathy, compassion, and integrity, become deep-seated habits that naturally lead to better outcomes. These aren’t temporary, transient, efforts your part; you’re building lasting qualities that fuel your ongoing growth.

    Ultimately, outward growth is a dynamic and continuous journey, changing as your inner self grows and deepens. It proves the power of aligning your self-awareness and personal beliefs with your actions, showing that true satisfaction, lifetime achievements, and meaningful impact on those around you naturally follow from a strong inner growth foundation.

  • View from our VRBO condo in St. Petersburg, Florida

    Journey of Personal Growth – Introduction

    “Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” 

    Albert Einstein

    When we are young, and even throughout high school and college, we are frequently asked some form of the following question: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Our answer would usually consist of career choices, such as a doctor, a lawyer, a fireman, a teacher, etc.

    My answer, at least until my disastrous freshman year at Centre College, was I wanted to be a doctor. Not because that was my first choice, but because that was my Mom’s desire for me. I have to admit I had no idea what I wanted to be.

    But from my perspective, after being on this planet for 67 years, a more important question that should be asked, and I wish someone had asked me, is: “How do you want to be known, as a person, when you grow up?” Not what my job title will be, not how successful I will be, or how much money I’ll make. But who, what kind of person am I? How will I be remembered? What value do I bring to the world around me?

    Knowing, identifying, who we are as a person is a necessary step in finding the answer to that question. This involves understanding what is important to us, what are our dreams, aspirations, goals, motivations, and expectations. Additionally, we must recognize that growth is a process; there is a method we must follow to become the person we want to be. In essence, there is a journey of personal growth we must experience. Your journey, and mine, applies beyond our “academic” learning experiences and encompasses every area of our lives. This broader “spectrum” of learning includes life experiences, emotional intelligence, social interactions, and spiritual growth. EVERY experience, big or small, contributes to our overall growth.

    This journey is a lifelong endeavor that is different for every individual, Yours will be totally different from mine, or your parents. There are no step-by-step instructions or a road map that we all can follow.

    I may have a certain perspective on the topic, but my views are uniquely mine alone, and do not necessarily apply to situation. The biggest mistake I made in the classroom was assuming that my students shared the same passions for problem-solving and for learning that I did. I expected them to be more like me and did not recognize where they were in their own individual journeys.

    There is no starting point or ending point; it is non-linear and cyclical, not a straight line between points A and B. It involves the support and influence of others, your parents, your family members, teachers, and friends. Influences that may cause you to lose sight of your own goals and expectations in favor of meeting other people’s expectations, becoming an obstacle to your own well-being. Social media pressures and your family dynamics may obscure your own internal compass.

    Your journey requires constant observation, reflection, and analysis, allowing you to perceive the world around you in greater clarity, appreciating the complexity and the connectivity. You will gain new insights, encounter new situations, and overcome limitations – shifting your perspectives on life (if you allow it). The satisfaction of overcoming challenges, learning new skills, and being aware of your progress will motivate you to continue learning and growing. Your expectations of yourself will change. You will set more ambitious goals, face challenges with more confidence, and appreciate the value of lifelong learning.

    Creating Your Own Map

    In our minds, we create a map, so to speak, of where we’re headed in our lives, what steps we need to follow, and how long we expect it to take. As you follow your map, you’ll be exposed to new experiences, perspectives, and challenges, forcing you to reevaluate your goals and expectations and your course. Follow your internal compass – your intuition, your moral compass, or your core values that guide you even when your map and where you are headed seem unclear. Think of the people who have supported you in your journey, like family, friends, and mentors, as fellow travelers or guides along your journey.

    Role of Family

    Everyone’s journey begins with family, shaping our values, ideals, and our early understanding of the world around us. Your family background serves, to use a chemistry term, as the catalyst for your journey. It helps to shape your values, beliefs, and early understanding of the world around you. And while your family situation has a significant influence on your journey, it is important to recognize that your family situation and your genetic predisposition does not define you – you can overcome any family dysfunction, becoming your own person with your own values and beliefs through self-awareness and hard work. It may take some time for you to find your way but it will happen.

    High School Years

    High school is a critical period in our lives. It is a time when you start to figure out who you are and become more independent, developing your own values that may differ from your family’s. Relationships with friends can be complicated, and you might face the challenge of choosing between fitting in with a group and staying true to yourself.

    Learning how to think critically and solve problems are important academic skills that are developed during high school. Thinking critically means to

    High school is where it is important to boost your critical thinking and problem-solving skills. Critical thinking basically means thinking clearly and logically, and being able to connect ideas. It’s all about looking at facts, evidence, things you observe, and arguments to come up with good conclusions and make smart choices. Your opportunities to improve these skill sets may not exist as much in the classroom, especially with the teach-to-the-test philosophy that permeates our secondary schools, but can be nurtured elsewhere, for example, playing video games.

    I can’t emphasize enough that it’s the process of learning is what is valuable throughout your life, even though the class material itself is only important in the short term to pass the next exam. 

    During these formative years you learn the importance of taking responsibility for your actions, both at home and in the classroom. Additionally, you will learn to recognize that you may not have all the answers and that you will need help and guidance from others, including your parents, teachers, and other people in your life. 

    Life can be challenging, and we often find ourselves merely surviving, going through the motions. Struggles can arise anytime, whether in school, work, or personal life.  Times when it’s difficult to know what the right thing to do is, the right decision to make, it’s all we can do to get up in the morning and go through the motions of daily life. School becomes a struggle – keeping up in the classroom, finishing homework on time, and maintaining good grades. It’s even more important during these difficult times to develop a support network, whether it is through your faith, a trusted friend, or mentor.

    These struggles are not just limited to your high school years; they may occur at any time along your career path. Life can throw you a lot of curve balls, unexpected events like illnesses, losing close friends or loved ones, or sudden opportunities that throw you off balance and make you reroute your path. But remember, all these things are valuable learning opportunities, events that help you discover new strengths, become more resilient and self-reliant.

    And finally, in high school, you begin to make decisions about your future education and career. You might decide that college isn’t for you, and that’s okay. Your long-term goals may not require a college degree, and you can always change your mind later. The important thing is to identify your passion and develop a vision for your future.

    College and Career

    This segment of our lives is where we truly embark on our personal journey, where we step into uncharted territory, so to speak. We establish our independence, for some, living away from home for the first time. We form intimate relationships, develop skills needed for our career choice, and build a network of friends, colleagues, and mentors that may last a lifetime.

    Commentary

    You will not always know which path you should follow or what role you are meant to play. It is only natural for you to make some wrong turns in your journey and at times feel lost. But it is so very important to realize these missteps, whether they are small or large, are valuable learning experiences. They teach us to be resilient and the importance of adaptability and self-correction – all benefits of practicing the art of self-awareness. And sometimes, regardless of the path we follow, we end up exactly where we are meant to be. Meaning we can’t always control the circumstances and situations we face in our lifetime; the best we can hope for is to be the best version of ourselves at the end of our journey. Knowing your own limitations is valuable; it requires an understanding of both your strengths and weaknesses. Regardless of what point you’re at in life, frequent self-assessments can be beneficial. To get you started, you’ll find one on the Self-assessment page of this blog.

  • My passion: Hemerocallis 'Eye-yi-yi' Daylily in my Shepherdsville, Kentucky perennial beds.

    The Essential Traits for Personal Growth

    “You can’t build a skyscraper on an outhouse foundation.”

    Dr. John Walkup

    Three integral, interrelated traits: curiosity, a passion for learning, and a passion for solving problems, when combined with self-awareness, are the foundation or prerequisites for personal growth and eventual success, regardless of which career path you may choose.

    By definition, prerequisite is something that has to happen first, something that must occur, or in this case, a personality trait that must be developed, before you can get to the next step or goal.

    For example, in education, a prerequisite is a course or subject that a student must complete before enrolling in a more advanced course. This ensures that a student has the foundational knowledge or skills needed to succeed in the more complex material.

    For the sake of our discussion, these three prerequisites, curiosity, a passion for learning, and the passion for solving problems, ensure that we have the necessary foundation, the skills necessary to succeed on our journey of personal growth.

    Curiosity

    “We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths”.

    Walt Disney

    It all begins with curiosity – always asking “why?” and “how?”. Curiosity is a fundamental human trait, our longing to understand the world around us. Curiosity is the spark for our desire to learn and explore, to ask questions, and to seek knowledge beyond the obvious. It opens the door for new experiences and perspectives. And enriches our understanding of the world around us.

    When you’re curious, learning isn’t just memorizing facts. It’s actively exploring ideas, solving problems, and discovering what truly interests you. This makes learning more engaging, turns you into a better thinker, and fuels your creativity. It’s also key to understanding yourself and what you’re passionate about, setting you up for a lifetime of exciting discoveries and personal growth.

    And when combined with open-mindedness, seeking answers to questions in areas that interest us stimulates our passion for learning and our desire to solve problems, to investigate, experiment, and discover.

    While some people may be more naturally curious than others, the good news is that curiosity can be cultivated and nurtured.

    • The most effective way to build your curiosity, ask questions, lots of them. No question is too simple or too complex as long as the purpose is to gain more knowledge. Strive for deeper understanding in your learning, asking “why” and “how,” refusing to accept surface-level explanations. 
    • Listen and be open to different points of view, and actively seek out knowledge and understanding. Take time to research, participate in conversations, and explore diverse perspectives different than your own, which can broaden your horizons and deepen your understanding. Maintaining an open mind, willing to consider new ideas and perspectives, is essential to staying curious.
    • Embracing your passions is another powerful way to develop your curiosity. When we immerse ourselves in subjects that truly fascinate us, the desire to learn becomes naturally motivated.
    • Finally, persistence is the key. When faced with challenges or setbacks, a curious person will persevere, viewing obstacles as opportunities for learning and growth.

    Passion for Solving Problems

    Problems are a natural part of life, and the ability to solve them effectively is essential for success in both your personal and professional life. The passion for solving problems is the strong desire to identify and overcome challenges. It is the driving force that keeps you focused, motivated, and driven to find creative solutions to the complex and some not-so-complex problems you face in your lifetime. Without a passion for problem-solving, you may be less likely to take risks and try new things, and more importantly, less likely to persevere in the face of failure. This will greatly impact your career success regardless of what field you choose.

    Problem-solving skills are more important now than ever and are in demand by employers who want employees who can rapidly adapt to new situations and find innovative solutions to challenges they encounter in the workplace. People passionate about solving problems are looking for new challenges and ways to improve things. They are not afraid to think outside the box and create innovative solutions. This is a valuable skill in any field, as it allows people to overcome obstacles and achieve their goals.

    Here are some of the benefits of having a passion for solving problems:

    • It makes you more versatile. The ability to solve problems is essential for adapting to change. When things don’t go according to plan, people passionate about solving problems quickly come up with a new solution. This is a valuable skill in today’s rapidly changing world.
    • It makes you more creative and innovative. Problem solving requires creativity and innovation. People who are passionate about solving problems are always looking for new and better ways to do things. This is an important skill for success in any field, as it allows people to develop new products, services, and processes.
    • It makes you more competitive. In today’s competitive job market, it is important to stand out from the crowd. A passion for problem-solving is a great way to do this. Employers are always looking for people who can solve problems and improve things.
    • It makes you more successful in your career. Studies have shown that people who are passionate about their work are more likely to be successful in their careers. They are also more likely to be happy and fulfilled in their work.

    How can you develop or enhance your passion for solving problems?

    • The first step to developing a passion for problem solving is to find a problem that you are passionate about. This could be anything from a personal problem to a global issue.
    • Then, do your research. Once you have found a problem that you are passionate about, learn as much as you can about it. This will help you to better understand the problem and to develop potential solutions.
    • Be creative and think outside the box. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box and come up with innovative solutions. The best solutions are often the ones that no one else has thought of.
    • Don’t be afraid to fail. Failure is a natural part of the problem-solving process. It is an opportunity to learn and grow.
    • Finally, take time to celebrate your success. This will help you to stay motivated and to keep solving problems.

    Developing a passion for problem-solving takes time and effort, but it is worth it. A passion for problem-solving will help you to succeed in any career path you choose, making you a more valuable asset to your employer and to society as a whole.

    Passion for learning

    A passion for learning is important for success, in school and whichever career path you choose. This is because the world is constantly changing, and new technologies and ways of doing things are emerging all the time. In order to stay ahead of the curve and be successful in any field, it is important to be willing to learn new things and adapt to change.

    A need to be “the expert” about something rarely impresses others and can actually hinder your own growth. Always be in the process of learning. Seek the counsel of others. Listen to their experiences. Feel free to say, “I don’t know—instruct me.” And let them fuel your growth.

    Here are some of the ways a passion for learning can contribute to your success:

    • It makes you more adaptable. The ability to adapt to change is essential for success in today’s rapidly changing world. A passion for learning will help you to be more adaptable and to learn new things quickly.
    • It makes you more creative and innovative. A passion for learning will help you to think more creatively and come up with innovative solutions to problems. This is an important skill for success in any field.
    • It makes you more competitive. In today’s competitive job market, it is important to stand out from the crowd. A passion for learning will help you to develop the skills and knowledge you need to be more competitive and to land your dream job.
    • It makes you more successful in your career. Studies have shown that people who are passionate about their work are more likely to be successful in their careers. They are also more likely to be happy and fulfilled in their work.

    If you are passionate about learning, you will be more likely to succeed in any career path you choose. You will be more adaptable, more creative, more innovative, and more competitive. You will also be more likely to be happy and fulfilled in your work.

    Here are some tips to develop or enhance your passion for learning:

    • Find something you are interested in. The first step to developing a passion for learning is to find something that you are interested in. This could be anything from a hobby to a subject in school.
    • Set goals for yourself. Once you have found something you are interested in, set some goals for yourself. What do you want to learn about it? How can you learn it?
    • Find a mentor. If you are serious about learning about something, find a mentor, a friend, a teacher, or a boss who can help you. And be willing to listen and open to their instruction. A mentor can provide you with guidance and support and help you to stay on track.
    • Join a group of people with similar interests and goals. There are many cohorts of people who are passionate about learning. Joining a group can help you stay motivated and connect with other people who share your interests.
    • And finally, make an investment to make learning a part of your daily routine. Set aside some time each day to learn something new. This could be reading a book, watching a documentary, or taking a class.

    Commentary

    I would like to think that my foundational skills were sufficient for me to succeed. I was, and still am, extremely curious about the subjects I am passionate about. I still keep up on discoveries in chemistry, physics, and education, and have acquired new interests such as gardening and writing, with this blog being an example.

    I had the passion for solving problems throughout my childhood, then, nurtured in college under the mentorship of Dr. Walkup and then the technical training I received in my years with Hewlett-Packard’s Analytical Products Division, it has become a major strength.

    Looking back, I can clearly see my past and present weaknesses. While my passion for learning is a strength, I’ve always been an independent learner, often to a fault. This reluctance to seek direction or advice from others is a significant weakness. I cannot stress enough the importance of developing and nurturing the skill of asking for guidance and humbly accepting instruction without defensiveness. My pride and arrogance led me to believe I knew more than those around me, and I deeply regret the missed opportunities to learn from them.

  • Learning from Mistakes

    “The greatest teacher failure is..”

    Yoda

    If I could identify one lesson from college that was the most valuable, it would be my professors’ requirement that we must identify the sources of error in every lab experiment. To recognize, through observation of the individual steps in an analysis, where there was the potential for an error that affected the eventual outcome of the experiment. Whether you obtained the correct answer or not. In every analysis we performed, there was always the potential for making a mistake in our preparation, observations, and calculations, each of which could give us the wrong answer.

    Fast forward to today, how does this concept apply in your world? If you apply an analytical approach to identifying sources of error when you get a wrong answer or make a mistake, it helps take the emotion out of the picture, allowing you to see it as a learning opportunity, encouraging you to identify and benefit from your mistakes in the future.

    I encourage you to consider the benefits of getting the wrong answer. Here are a few:

    Mistakes help us to identify what we don’t know. This can be a good thing because it allows us to redirect our learning and to focus on the areas where we need the most improvement.

    Mistakes can encourage us to think about how much effort we invested in learning the material. When we are trying to understand why we got the wrong answer, we are forced to think more deeply, develop a greater understanding of the concepts, versus simply rote memorization.

    Mistakes can help us become more resilient. When we make mistakes, it is important to learn from them and keep moving forward, which is an important skill for success in all areas of life.

    And, mistakes can help us to be more creative. When we are not afraid to make mistakes, we are more likely to try new things and to come up with new ideas. A valuable skill that is beneficial throughout our lives.

    How to we begin to learn from our mistakes? 

    To begin with, don’t beat yourself up. Everyone makes mistakes. It is important to forgive yourself and to move on.

    Then try to identify and acknowledge the mistake you made. What was the root cause of the mistake? Once you understand the root cause, you can take steps to avoid making the same mistake in the future.

    Finally, learn from your mistake. What can you do differently next time? Think about how you can apply what you have learned to improve your performance. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you are struggling to understand a concept or to solve a problem, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Take my advice, if you ask someone for help, be prepared to listen with and open mind and not get defensive. There is always someone wiser than you or me whose instruction is valuable.

    By following these three tips, you can turn your mistakes into learning opportunities and become the best version of yourself.

    Commentary

    As I have gotten older, my perspective has changed, and I’ve come to recognize and admit to myself the mistakes I have made over the years. I have always been able to apply the concepts of error analysis throughout my career. When it pertained to recognizing the weaknesses or failures in an analysis, it was one of my most recognized capabilities. I prided myself on my ability to apply the Scientific Method to almost any situation. However, very seldom did I apply the same skillset to my personal life.

    When we fail, especially in our careers or our personal lives, it is very easy to blame someone else, our boss, a coworker, our parents, spouse, or significant other. We may blame the situation we were in as if it were out of our own control. We blame anyone and everything in order to deflect the responsibility for our mistakes and failures from the person responsible, ourselves. I readily admit I am an example of these same habits. 

    The personal trait of self-awareness, which I will discuss in detail in a later post, allows us to recognize and acknowledge our weaknesses as well as our strengths. It acts as our internal GPS so to speak, showing us where we make a wrong turn in our lives and directing us back on track. Learning from each misadventure, becoming more humble, less arrogant and prideful, accepting blame where it is needed, and leading us on the path to wisdom. 

    I am nowhere close on my journey of personal growth, but I do believe I am getting better at admitting my mistakes and attempting to learn from them each day. And, hopefully, by doing so, I am a better person today than I was yesterday and will be an even better person tomorrow.