Chemistry is not torture but instead the amazing and beautiful science of stuff, and if you give it a chance, it will not only blow your mind but also give you a deeper understanding of your world.
– Hank Green
My initial perception of chemistry differed significantly from Hank Green’s. My unfortunate experience with Dr. Bill Sagar’s Organic I course and his synthesis lab at Centre College in the late 1970s was responsible for this perspective. I would have preferred a novocaine-free wisdom tooth extraction to repeating that freshman year course. The sheer volume of material on his exams, coupled with my inability to memorize and regurgitate facts, proved overwhelming. Furthermore, I found the compound syntheses in the lab impossible. While I excel at instrumental lab activities and compound extractions, Dr. Sagar’s lab experience was so disheartening that it nearly destroyed my desire for any further lab courses at Centre. Ultimately, that single course, in which I received a “D,” sealed my fate as a pre-med major.
A year later, Dr. John Walkup, who was the Chair of the Chemistry Division, and would become my mentor, presented a holistic view of chemistry in his courses. He emphasized the habits, traits, and skills crucial to be successful as a chemist. His approach inspired in me an appreciation and passion for chemistry in all areas, from Organic II (yes, I enrolled in and survived a second year of Organic, this time I got a “B”) to Physical Chemistry (a stunning blend of math and chemistry) and Instrumental Chemistry (which became my true love). We explored not just the how but also why reactions occurred, but also their application, their importance in different field of chemistry. We were taught to “think’ like a chemist, the importance of observation – recognizing strengths and weaknesses of a chemical process, then identifying the possible sources of error in our analyses.
After 35-plus years in various fields of chemistry, I strongly recommend to student pursuing a chemistry major or a broader STEM career that I tutor, to maintain an open mind throughout their science coursework. It will not always be an easy path to follow. You will encounter challenges, and there will be days when switching to business management or accounting might seem appealing. However, persevere. Have faith in yourself. Seek out mentors, engage with your professors, learn their office hours, and visit frequently. While it may now always seem like it, I can assure you that chemistry is a beautiful field of study. It is both an art and a science, inviting you to experience the wonder and awe of the world around you.
The key to a successful analysis or experiment is a detailed procedure to follow. First, it provides a list of all the key starting materials you need to gather, along with the quantities of each. Then step-by-step instructions on how to combine these materials. Then details regarding under what conditions the reaction mechanism drives the reaction process to its completion, resulting in the product or products you desire. A quality procedure also lists the byproducts that a reaction process may produce. And finally, a section on sources of error, a detailed description of possible errors that can be made, and the effect of these mistakes on the reaction process, and which products or byproducts are produced.
I can attest to the fact that writing a quality procedure is a challenging task. I’ve drafted my share of procedures in my career, and I’ve found that it requires extensive hands-on experience performing the chemical reaction process and an in-depth understanding of how each step of the procedure contributes to the overall desired result. More importantly, I found that the sources of error section is the most difficult section to write. Luckily, I was blessed to have college professors whose primary focus was on the documentation of every possible source of error in every experiment we performed and on every lab report we prepared in our advanced chemistry and physics courses.
So, how does this concept of a detailed procedure apply in our chemical reaction analogy of personal growth? I can honestly say there were points in my life that I had no idea what I was supposed to do, what decision to make, what path to follow. I wished I had had a detailed procedure to follow, a document that told me what decisions I should make, and when, to obtain the goals, and the success I was seeking. A set of step-by-step instructions defining what skills and traits I needed to possess, and the decisions I needed to make. And more importantly, I could’ve used a sources of error section that identified what mistakes I might make, describing how to, if not avoid them, deal with them constructively and not get sidetracked on my journey.
But, as I have learned and become painfully aware of at times, there is no one universal set of instructions we can follow for personal success. While there are plenty of books written on the subject, not one is universally applicable to each of us, with our individual personality traits, gifts, dreams, and aspirations.
Creating Your Procedure for Personal Growth
You cannot find a procedure tailored personally for you in a blog, book, or video; you produce it. It’s not a set of instructions someone else has written for your life. Instead, you create it with a combination of self-assessment and a growth mindset, the understanding that there is always more you can learn.
To begin, you need to develop an awareness of the starting materials component for your personal growth procedure through honest self-assessment – identifying your strengths, weaknesses, motivations, and natural tendencies (how you react in different situations). This is the initial observation stage, much like in the Scientific Method.
Continue to ask yourself: “What have I done in the past that’s worked for me?”, “What approach or actions to address challenges or concerns feels natural to me?”, and “What habits, good and bad, do I tend to fall into?” This self-assessment ensures your approach is personalized and realistic. Following a generic procedure that works for someone else might produce a result in you that leaves you feeling emotionally, mentally, or physically drained.
Remember that this journey is yours, and yours alone.
Step Two: Utilizing a Growth Mindset
Once you’ve identified your core starting materials, turn your attention outward. See how others have achieved similar goals. Dive into books and articles about what you’re interested in. Find mentors who have already done what you want to do, ask for their input, seek their instruction. And, try to learn from their successes and failures. Figure out what works for them and then make it your own.
Perfecting Your Procedure: The Scientific Method
You don’t know what to do at the beginning; you discover it. Your procedure for personal growth is not something you are handed at the beginning of your journey. Instead, your initial procedure is a hypothesis – a best guess based on your self-awareness and research. Through the process of experimentation, analysis, and revision, you refine that hypothesis. The final, tested and proven procedure is the culmination of your observation and learning. It represents the wisdom and practical knowledge you’ve gained from the entire process.
Your “procedure” is not a fixed set of instructions; it is dynamic and constantly changing. As you learn more about yourself and the world around you, your procedure must adapt to who you are and your unique situation at each stage of your personal growth. What works for you today may not be what you need a year from now. Your procedure adapts as you gain new insights, as your world changes, and as your goals evolve.
This is the power of applying the scientific method to your life: you are constantly running small experiments, collecting data on your results, and refining your methods for the next reiteration. It’s a continuous, cyclical process of learning and adaptation. Your journey of personal growth is ever-evolving; each day brings with it new challenges. Personal growth dictates that who we are today is different than who we were yesterday, and hopefully, tomorrow we will be better than we are today.
Throughout our lives, we are constantly asked, “What do you want to do?” “What are your goals?” and “What do you expect to achieve?” These aren’t just questions in a job interview or at a parent-teacher conference; they are at the heart of our motivations and expectations.
Motivations: The Source of Your Personal Growth Blueprint
Motivations are the “why” behind your work. Think of them as the desire that inspires you as the architect of your personal growth —the deep, personal reasons you to start your personal growth journey in the first place.
Why do you wake up every morning and choose to work hard? Is it to solve a problem that fascinates you, to help others, for financial security, or to gain recognition? The reasons we tackle any task are our motivations. Knowing what truly motivates you is the difference between building a life that fulfills you and simply going through the motions. Without understanding your motivations, you risk creating a blueprint that someone else designed for you, leaving you feeling empty even after you’ve “finished” the job. Your motivations are your fuel. They provide the passion and perseverance necessary to overcome challenges and bring a vision to life.
Intrinsic Motivation
Intrinsic motivation is deeply personal and originates from within us. It is a dynamic force that drives us to participate in activities simply for the joy and satisfaction they bring. This type of motivation is closely tied to our dreams and aspirations. It is what pushes us to achieve personal goals, pursue our passions, and continuously work to improve ourselves. When you’re driven by what you truly want and value, not just other people’s demands, you feel in control and that you’re making your own choices.
Extrinsic Motivation
On the other hand, extrinsic motivation comes from outside influences and the rewards they offer. You do the activity not because you enjoy it, but because of what you’ll get from it, whether that’s something you can touch or something less tangible. These benefits could include things like grades, praise, recognition, money, or social status. While extrinsic motivation can be a useful tool for achieving specific goals, it is important to recognize that it can also have its limitations. If we completely rely on extrinsic motivation, not on our desires and expectations, it can leave us feeling unsatisfied, empty, even though we have achieved the benefits we were seeking.
How They Relate to Each Other
What really drives us comes from both intrinsic and extrinsic motivations. We might do things just because they make us feel good or because we’re curious (that’s intrinsic). Or, we might do things for external reasons, like getting a bonus or to get an “A” on a report card (that’s extrinsic). Usually, it’s a mix of both. Take getting a master’s degree, for instance, you might want the opportunity to learn and grow (intrinsic), but you may also think about the better job opportunities the degree provides and the more money you can make (extrinsic).
Striking a balance between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation is often the key to achieving long-term success and happiness. While external rewards can provide a temporary boost, it is the internal drive and passion that sustains us over time. It is important to cultivate your intrinsic motivation by identifying activities that you genuinely enjoy and find meaningful. This may involve exploring our interests, discovering your passions, and setting personal goals that align with your values.
To truly understand our motivations, we must also practice the art of self-reflection. This means asking yourself tough questions about what drives you, what rewards are you seeking, and if your motivations align with your fundamental values. As you grow, your motivations change, so it’s an ongoing process. You’ll need to regularly check if what drives you still aligns with your goals and helps you feel good overall.
When we get to know ourselves better and understand what really motivates us, we can make smarter decisions, set goals that truly matter, and live a life that feels more deliberate and fulfilling. Just remember, real motivation comes from within, and that inner drive is what helps us reach our full potential.
Expectations: The Specifications of Your Personal Growth Blueprint
While motivations explain the “why,” expectations clarify the “what” and “how much,” serving as precise specifications on a blueprint. Expectations come from two sources: external expectations, which are standards set by others, like our parents’ expectations for us or a boss’s performance objectives, which represents what the world anticipates from you. Internal expectations, which are the standards you impose on yourself, such as desired grades, work quality, or personal values, representing the standards you uphold for yourself.
As the architect of your personal growth, you must be keenly aware of both. You cannot build a solid structure without a clear plan. Your expectations provide the necessary direction and the measurable goals that turn your motivations into real actions.
External Motivations
Throughout our lives, external expectations are placed upon us by others. During childhood and our teenage years, these expectations primarily come from parents and teachers, who set standards for how well we do in school, our behavior, and how we act in social settings. As we enter adulthood, the sources of external expectations broaden to include employers, people we work with, friends, partners, and society in general. These can include a wide range of areas, such as our career success, being stable financially, our relationships, and meeting society’s expectations.
It’s great to get guidance and motivation from others, but remember that what others expect isn’t always what we really want or value. Trying to make everyone happy can leave you feeling overwhelmed, not good enough, and like you’ve lost control. It’s important to figure out which external expectations are worth chasing and which ones you should politely pass on, always putting your own well-being and personal growth first.
Internal Expectations
Our internal expectations originate from our personal values, goals, and aspirations, reflecting our beliefs about our capabilities. These internal expectations span various aspects of life, including personal growth, career success, healthy living, our relationships, and our creative pursuits. While they can be a powerful motivator, driving us to excel, it’s vital that that our internal expectations remain realistic.
Let’s be honest, most of us, myself included, have at some point in our lives created unrealistic expectations about how quickly we should be able to master something – studying for an exam, getting a promotion, completing a training course. Perhaps it’s “I expect to be paid ‘x’ number of dollars for working as a (fill in the blank) because they’re lucky to have me.” Or, “I shouldn’t have to start at the bottom and work my way up, because they’re lucky to have me.”
Unattainable standards or expecting instant success can lead to frustration and a sense of failure. It is crucial to be patient with yourself, practice self-compassion, acknowledge that progress requires time and effort, remember to embrace a growth mindset, and celebrate minor achievements to keep motivated.
How They Relate to Each Other
What we expect from ourselves often comes from outside sources like what society tells us, educational standards, and seeing what other people have achieved. It’s important to know yourself and your aspirations, and consider just where these expectations come from. Do they actually fit with what we value and love, or are we just trying to please others and get their approval?
How we feel about ourselves, our self-worth, and self-esteem really gets shaped by a combination of what we expect of ourselves and what others expect of us. When we meet or even go beyond those expectations, it feels great. But if we miss the mark, it can lead to feeling down, ashamed, or just not good enough.
Remember that your value as a person isn’t tied to always meeting every expectation, whether it’s something we put on ourselves or something someone else expects. You’re growing and changing all the time, and hitting roadblocks or messing up is just part of the deal. By being kind to yourself, accepting who you are, and focusing on what truly drives you from the inside, you can build a strong sense of self-worth that will stick with you, no matter what others think or how much pressure we feel.
The Role of Our Aspirations
Knowing what you want, your aspirations, is key to setting your own expectations. When your expectations come from inside you, they lead to lasting happiness. But if they’re just based on what others think, that happiness won’t stick around. To find balance, make sure your goals match your aspirations, what you truly important to you. Be proud of what you achieve, even if no one else is cheering, and be kind to yourself when things don’t go as planned. Always put your values, passions, and goals first.
Motivations, Expectations, and Your Blueprint for Personal Growth
The true strength of motivations and expectations is how they interact with each other. Motivations provide vision and energy, while expectations offer the set of instructions on our blueprint for personal growth.
Personal growth occurs when your internal motivations are in harmony with your chosen expectations. This alignment is key to truly designing your growth blueprint. For example, if you love helping people, you might volunteer or work in public service. Or, if you’re motivated to become an expert, you’ll naturally keep learning and improving your skills.
Remember, in the end, life is not just about ticking off a bunch of external boxes on a to-do list. It’s about really understanding what drives you and then picking goals that help you build a life that feels truly meaningful and personal.
You’re building your personal growth building, and you’re the architect. This “architect” is your guide, turning your dreams into a clear vision of what you want to achieve. Acting as your personal growth architect will create a “blueprint” for your development, showing you the structure and key parts of your metaphorical building. Making sure your goals are solid and well defined, explaining how your dreams and goals create a strong foundation for your motivation and expectations, which then helps you move forward.
But this role of an architect isn’t just about getting things done; it also focuses on how you experience your journey. It ensures everything lines up with who you want to be, both personally and publicly, making your whole growth process real and rewarding. As you start putting your plans into action, this architect offers a blueprint to follow, providing guidance, keeping you on track, helping you adjust, and making sure everything fits with your overall strategy.
Ultimately, your growth blueprint helps you be clear on your vision, create a smart plan, connect different parts of your development, and finally build the life you imagine. Your growth architect could be your inner self, or a mentor, a coach, or even a structured way of thinking about yourself and your future. Regardless of who assumes the role of your personal growth architect, the blueprint design process begins with self-awareness.
The Role of Self-awareness
The most significant component in designing your blueprint for personal growth is self-awareness. It is the prerequisite—our knowledge of who we are and what we desire—on which our blueprint is based.
Self-awareness can be a complex idea, but consider it this way: I know I want to grow a vegetable garden (self-awareness), versus with my role as an architect on this project, which involves the actual design (blueprint), selecting the plants, and determining their care.
Self-awareness allows me to understand what I want to do and why I want to do it, my dreams, aspirations, goals, motivations, and expectations. In this particular example, it involves asking: Why do I want a garden? Why is it important to me? What do I expect it to look like? How soon do I want it ready? Once this groundwork is complete, only then can I take on the role of the architect and prepare a blueprint.
My Dad was a civil engineer. Where an architect works with people wanting to design their new home or businesses wanting to design new office space, my Dad would meet with developers planning new subdivisions, turning their ideas into detailed blueprints for streets, utilities, and home lots. Then, with a survey crew, he’d mark out key locations precisely, giving construction crews exact points to build from. His careful supervision continued until the project was complete.
I still remember spending Saturday and Sunday afternoons helping my Dad in the field, measuring distances between property lines, new home foundations, utility lines, and easements. I really liked the work, so much so that during college summers, I’d join a survey crew for the Kentucky State Department of Highways, where my Dad was the District Engineer. It allowed me to use the math and physics concepts that I enjoyed from college. Why I didn’t follow in my Dad’s footsteps and become a civil engineer, I don’t know. I guess, like all of us, I needed to find my own path in life.
I wish I had learned to create a clear blueprint for my life’s dreams and aspirations—something with defined goals and objectives, ways to track my progress, and built-in accountability. Back in college, some of my friends were way ahead of me on this. One good friend, who’s a doctor now, followed in his Dad’s footsteps. He showed up at Centre with a complete and detailed academic plan, knowing exactly which classes he needed for medical school and how hard he’d have to work to achieve the grades he wanted. He even found friends who shared his views to team up with, keeping each other accountable and supporting one another through tough times.
Looking back, I spent my years throughout high school and my freshman year at Centre unsure of my direction. It wasn’t until my sophomore year, when I met Dr. Walkup, that I found a true mentor. He guided me, set clear expectations for success, and, crucially, held me accountable. Forty-five years later, in my late 60’s, I’d like to believe I know what I’m doing, but sometimes I still have my doubts. Even now, I find myself still searching for a blueprint on how to be the best father, grandfather, husband, and person I can be.
So, we have this incredible building of personal growth, with its strong foundation and aspiring capstone. But how do we know we’re heading in the right direction? That’s where self-awareness, our internal “GPS” comes in.. It helps us pinpoint where we are right now and where we truly want to go. And once we have that clarity, we can then step into an even more powerful role: that of our architect, consciously designing and constructing the path to that very destination we desire.
Think about your favorite video game or an elaborate set of LEGO™ building blocks. Before you can build something amazing or conquer a level, you need to know the rules, the tools you have, and where you want to go, right? Well, the same goes for growing as a person! Self-awareness is like having your internal map and knowing yourself really well – your strengths, your feelings, and what you truly care about. Understanding yourself is the first step to designing the kind of person you want to become and the life you want to build.
Now imagine you’re the architect of your personal growth building. You get to design who you want to be and what you want to achieve. But just like any good architect, you need to know your materials and have a clear vision, a good set of blueprints. That is the role of self-awareness. Self-awareness is the process of getting to know your values, your skills, and what sparks your interest. It’s the foundation for making smart choices and building a future that’s uniquely yours.
And just like a GPS helps you navigate physical terrain, self-awareness helps you navigate your personal landscape. Self-awareness is like your inner moral compass, helping you make choices that truly align with your gut feelings and what you value most. It’s about figuring out what truly matters to you, ensuring that your actions reflect who you genuinely are. This inner guide also helps you set goals based on your dreams and aspirations, turning them into clear “checkpoints” on your life’s journey.
Also, self-awareness, acting as your internal GPS, lets you see how far you’ve come, and how much further you have to go, giving you clarity on your journey and chances to celebrate all your wins, big or small. Life isn’t usually a straight line; it’s more like a complex roadmap with twists, turns, and unexpected detours. In this ever-changing landscape, self-awareness is beneficial. By regularly thinking about your experiences, changing values, and goals, it lets you adjust your “direction” when you need to. This ability to make important course corrections keeps you aligned with your evolving self, leading to a deeper understanding of who you’re becoming.
Plus, this metaphorical GPS can show you different ways to reach your goals, giving you practical ideas about how long it might take and how much effort you’ll need. It encourages flexibility, helping you gracefully handle unexpected challenges and changes. When you inevitably feel “lost” or unsure, self-awareness shines a light on where you are in your journey. It not only shows you how far you’ve come but also reminds you of your inner strength and all the amazing progress you’ve made. Recognizing where we are on our personal map, even when feeling disoriented, can be immensely reassuring. It helps us appreciate the progress we’ve made, recalibrate our direction when needed, and refuel our motivation to continue our journey.
Ultimately, self-awareness is key to appreciating your ongoing progress, adjusting your course when things go off track, and boosting your motivation, pushing you forward with a fresh and clear sense of purpose.
How to Cultivate Your Self-awareness
Self-awareness is a skill that, like a musical talent, such as playing the piano or the guitar, can be significantly improved through consistent effort, or practice, combined with specific techniques and activities. While you may already have a natural ability for playing an instrument or in the case of self-awareness, introspection or reflection, these are skills must still be developed. For self-awareness is an ongoing journey of discovery, where your investment of your time in mastering the following techniques along with a willingness to explore your inner self can lead to your significant growth as a person.
This growth goes beyond understanding your strengths and weaknesses; it involves a deeper understanding of your emotions, thoughts, values, and motivations. It requires observing how these shape our behaviors and how we react to the world around us. Consider it like possessing an internal GPS system that continuously calibrates and refines its accuracy. Our constantly evolving and improving inner compass helps us navigate life’s obstacles, make well-informed choices, and encourage more honest relationships.
To develop your self-awareness, consider these three components: an honest self-assessment, journaling, and seeking feedback from trusted peers (parents, mentors, teachers, and close friends). Each offers a distinct perspective on your inner workings, revealing valuable insights into your patterns and tendencies. The consistent commitment to these practices sharpens your awareness of your inner self, helping you to understand and control your emotions, improve your decision-making, and provide a clearer sense of purpose. Ultimately, self-awareness is a continuous journey of growth, changing as we mature and experience new things.
The best place to start to grow your self-awareness is with a comprehensive self-assessment that encourages you to think about your:
Dreams and Aspirations: What is your long-term vision? What impact do you want to make in the world? What kind of future do you imagine for yourself?
Goals: What specific goals are you working towards in your academic and personal lives?
Strengths: What are you naturally good at? What skills and talents come easily to you? What do others praise you for?
Weaknesses (or Areas for Growth): Where do you struggle? What skills need development? What habits might be holding you back?
This initial self-assessment provides a valuable foundation for building self-awareness. It helps you understand your internal compass and identify areas where you want to focus your energy.
Next, I encourage you to keep a personal journal or even a private blog where you reflect on what you are learning in your courses, interactions with others, and daily activities, plus the challenges you are facing and how you are overcoming them. Journaling provides you an opportunity to:
Map Your Progress: Regularly writing down your experiences, thoughts, and feelings related to your goals allows you to track how far you’ve come and identify patterns in your progress.
Reflect on Your Struggles: Journaling provides a safe space to explore challenges, frustrations, and setbacks. By writing about these difficulties, you can gain clarity, identify potential solutions, and learn from your experiences.
Deepen Your Understanding of Who You Are: The act of writing forces you to express your thoughts and emotions, leading to a deeper understanding of your motivations, expectation and how you react in different situations.
Identify Patterns: Over time, journaling can reveal recurring patterns in your thoughts, behaviors, and emotional responses, offering valuable insights into your personality and habits. Journaling encourages you to explore and define your core values through self-reflection.
With practice, you will learn to spend time in deliberate reflection, asking yourself questions such as: How did I feel today and why?, Why did I react that way in that situation and what can I learn from it?, What can I do differently given the same situation?, What are my core values and are they changing?, What are my current goals and why are they important to me?
Finally, learn to ask others for their feedback on your progress, your actions and behavior, keeping an open mind and without getting defensive. I suggest asking trusted friends, family, or mentors for constructive feedback on how you come across to others. And while this can be challenging, it provides valuable perspective. More importantly, your willingness to reflect on this feedback objectively and identify patterns or areas where you can grow is a beneficial component of your personal growth.
As a STEM student, this combination of activities can be particularly effective. You should appreciate the logical and scientific approach, a self-assessment followed by consistent journaling provides the framework for self-awareness. And, journaling can be seen as a way to collect “data” about yourself, which you can then analyze for insights and trends. This aligns with the analytical mindset you’ll need for success in the STEM fields. And finally, this process has its focus on growth and Improvement. It naturally encourages a growth mindset by prompting you to identify areas for improvement and track your development over time.
In conclusion, do not forget that self-awareness is a continuous process, not a one-time activity. Practice it daily. Connect it to your goals. Remember self-awareness is a great tool to help you succeed in your studies, your future careers, and all areas of your life. Ultimately, self-awareness is the key to appreciating your ongoing progress, adjusting your course when things go off track, and boosting your motivation, pushing you forward with a fresh and clear sense of purpose.
