Musings of an Old Chemist

A Chemist's Perspective on the Habits and Skills STEM Students Need For Success

Tag: resilience

The Grade Illusion: Why High Test Scores Don’t Necessarily Equate With Concept Mastery (And How to Fix It)
If you are an aspiring STEM student, or the parent of one, I want you to consider a terrifying possibility: It is possible to have a 4.0 GPA and know/retain almost nothing.

I saw this contradiction in the students I would tutor. They were bright, hardworking, and ambitious. They had mastered the art of getting the “A.” They knew how to take tests, follow instructions, and allocate their time to receive a high score.

However, if I asked them to apply a physics concept from two weeks before to a new problem assigned that day, they would freeze. Their knowledge of the material (data) was gone.

This is the Grade Illusion. We have built an educational culture – especially in high-stakes fields like STEM, where the “High Score” has become the product. But in the real world, the test scores from high school and college courses are irrelevant. The only thing that matters is mastering the content.

If you want to survive the transition from “A-student” to “successful scientist,” you need to understand how your own mind works. You need to stop renting knowledge and start owning it.

The Knowledge Retention Misconception: RAM vs. Hard Drive

To understand why intelligent students often feel like impostors, we need to examine how the brain stores information.

Think of your brain like a computer. You have two types of storage:
1. RAM (Random Access Memory): This is short-term, high-speed memory storage. It holds the data you need right now. It is volatile; when the power cuts (or the test ends), the data is wiped to make room for the next task.
2. The Hard Drive: This is long-term storage. It is slower to write to, but the data remains there forever, ready to be recalled years later.
The modern educational system encourages you to use your RAM, not your Hard Drive. We call this Cramming, or as we discussed in an earlier blog post, the act of memorization/regurgitation.

When you cram for a calculus midterm, you are loading complex formulas into your RAM. You hold them there—stressfully—for 24 hours. You walk into the exam, dump the RAM onto the paper, and get a 95%. You feel successful.

But 48 hours later, that RAM is cleared to make space for Chemistry. The “Save to Hard Drive” function never happened.

The Science of Forgetting

This isn’t just a metaphor; it is a biological fact. In the late 19th century, psychologist Hermann Ebbinghaus mapped the “Forgetting Curve.”

The curve shows that without deep processing (the struggle necessary to understand something), humans lose roughly 50% of new information within a day and 90% within a week.

The student who crams and gets an “A” peaks at 100% on Tuesday morning. By next Tuesday, their retention dropped to nearly the same level as that of the student who failed. The grade is a record of what you knew for one hour, not what you carry into your career.

From an economics perspective, consider this as the difference between Renting and Owning.
- Cramming is Renting. You pay a high price in stress and sleep deprivation. You get to “live” in the knowledge for a day. But once the test is over, your “lease” is up, and you are evicted. You have zero equity.
- Deep Learning is Owning. You pay a “mortgage” of daily, consistent study. It feels slower. It feels harder. But two years later, when you are designing a load-bearing bridge, for example, that physics principle is yours.
The Illusion of Competence

“But I got an A!” you might argue. “The test says I know the material.”

Does it?

In 1956, in the publication “Taxonomy of Educational Objectives: The Classification of Educational Goals,” a committee of educators chaired by Benjamen Bloom developed a framework to rank levels of understanding called “Bloom’s Taxonomy.”

Shutterstock

Most high school tests—and frankly, many college exams—operate at the bottom three levels: Knowledge (learn the formula), Comprehension (understand when to use the formula), and Application (plug numbers into the formula).

If you are good at memorization, you can ace these tests without ever moving up the pyramid. But a career in STEM fields lives entirely at the top three levels:
- Analysis: Why did the experiment fail?
- Evaluation: Which method is best for this specific application?
- Synthesize (Create): Develop an improved solution that isn’t in the textbook.
The Illusion of Competence

This creates the Illusion of Competence. You have a transcript full of “A’s” that certify you are an expert, but your internal drive has never been stress-tested at the “Analysis” or “Synthesis” level. When you eventually hit a problem that requires those skills, you don’t just struggle—you crash.

The most dangerous side effect of the Grade Illusion isn’t academic; it’s psychological.

The Performance = Identity Misconception

When you spend your entire life chasing the “High Score,” you begin to associate your Performance with your Identity. You believe the equation: My Grade = My Worth.

In STEM, this is lethal. In English class, a grade of “C” might seem subjective. In Physics or Chemistry, a “wrong answer” is objectively wrong. If you tie your self-worth to getting the right answer, every mistake feels like a character flaw.

You need to adopt the mindset of a Scientist:
- You are the Learning Process itself. You are the curiosity, the work ethic, the resilience.
- The Grade is just Data. It is simply the output of a single, specific experiment on a single specific day.
For example, if a Ferrari engine performs poorly because it had bad fuel, we don’t say the engine is trash. We say the input (fuel) was wrong. Similarly, if you fail a test, it doesn’t mean you are broken. It means your variables—your study habits, your sleep, your preparation—were off.

A bad grade is not your identity. It is guidance.

Breaking the Cycle

Ready to shift from being a “Grade Hunter” to a true “Learner”? Use these two simple techniques to pinpoint where you are in that transition and determine the necessary steps to move forward.

1. The “Two-Week Audit.”

I challenge you to a challenging experiment. Take a test you aced two weeks ago. Sit down and take it right now, without reviewing your notes.

The difference between your score then (95%) and your score now (55%) is your Fake (Lost) Knowledge. That 40-point gap represents wasted energy. It is time spent renting, not owning. If the gap is huge, your study method is broken, regardless of your GPA.

2. The Feynman Technique (The Ownership Test)

Physicist Richard Feynman had a simple rule for understanding, which he borrowed from Albert Einstein. To prove you have mastered a concept, you must be able to explain it in simple language, without jargon, to someone who has no background in the topic (like a smart 12-year-old).

If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it. You have only memorized the definition. You are stuck at the bottom of Bloom’s Taxonomy.

The Bottom Line

The world is full of influencers and algorithms showing you the easy way to obtain a high test score on the ACT and achieve the most sought-after degrees, jobs, and accolades. Yet they rarely show you how to retain the knowledge required for long-term success.

Success in STEM requires three “old school” prerequisites that cannot be skipped: Curiosity, a Passion for Learning, and a Passion for Solving Problems.

If you have these, the grades will eventually follow. But more importantly, later in life, when the grades stop mattering, the expertise will remain.
January 4, 2026
Mastering Emotional Intelligence for Personal Growth

When we talk about the subject of personal growth, we usually split things into two buckets: “Inner” growth (a growth mindset, self-awareness, and resilience) and “Outer” growth (relationships, communication skills, achievements, and recognition). However, here’s the missing piece in our model: Emotional Intelligence (EQ). Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the bridge that unites these two separate ideas, preparing you to be successful as a functioning member of society, regardless of your chosen career path. Producing real-world success that people actually notice.

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) isn’t just about being nice; it is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions while recognizing and acknowledging the feelings of others. If your IQ measures your intelligence or book knowledge, EQ measures your people skills and self-control. It is the connection between thinking and feeling.

The Four Core Pillars of Emotional Intelligence (EQ)

Pillar #1: Self-awareness

In a previous blog post, we defined Self-Awareness as the GPS for our process of personal growth. And it is the absolute starting point for emotional intelligence (EQ). It’s all about understanding your own moods, feelings, what drives you, and how all that affects the people around you. To master this, you need to take an honest look at what you’re good at and what you struggle with, and feel genuinely confident in yourself. The key thing is, a self-aware person doesn’t just feel an emotion; they can actually figure out why they’re feeling frustrated, happy, or stressed. This deep internal check is the groundwork for everything else in emotional intelligence.

Pillar #2: Self-control

The second component, self-control (self-management), follows self-awareness. It is crucial for keeping destructive emotions and urges in check, so you can stay calm and collected, even when things get stressful. Think of it as emotional control—it’s that ability to hit the pause button between feeling an impulse and actually doing something about it. This pause allows you to make smart, principled decisions instead of just reacting impulsively or defensively. Self-management includes being flexible, taking initiative, and keeping a positive attitude in order to reach your goals, even when you face roadblocks.

Common Examples:

When receiving constructive criticism, someone with low emotional intelligence (EQ) might immediately become defensive, blame someone else for their mistake, or just give the person the silent treatment, which is not helpful. In contrast, a person with high emotional intelligence will pause, acknowledge that the criticism, while it may feel uncomfortable, is justified, and then ask what they need to do to improve, genuinely thanking the person for being honest.

When having a “bad day,” a person with low emotional intelligence stressed about a meeting or a deadline, might react by snapping at their parents, spouse, friend, or even someone in a restaurant or store, just because they are in the way. A highly emotionally intelligent response is to recognize the feeling of being overwhelmed and directly tell a partner, “I’m having a ridiculously stressful day and I’m a bit on edge. I need 20 minutes of quiet to de-stress so I don’t accidentally take it out on you.”

Pillar #3: Social Awareness

Social Awareness (Empathy) is the third key ability, which is shifting your focus away from yourself and focusing on others. This crucial skill enables you to sense, understand, and respond well to the emotional needs and concerns of those around you. Often described as being able to “read the room”, it requires you to see things from someone else’s perspective and grasp the mood of the situation. It goes beyond just seeing that someone is upset; strong social awareness helps you to understand why they are feeling that way, which is critical for great relationships and connecting with others.

For Example:

During a big disagreement, either at home, school, or at work, a person with low emotional intelligence makes their goal to “win” the argument and prove the other person is wrong. Conversely, a highly emotionally intelligent individual focuses on understanding the other person’s perspective, asking questions like, “Help me out here – why is this so important to you?” because they value the relationship more than being right.

Pillar #4: Building Relationships

Building Relationships is the final stage of emotional intelligence. It’s where you combine your emotional intelligence and social skills to manage complicated social situations, inspiring others. This is the top level of emotional intelligence, showing how well you can influence people, get them on board, and help them grow. It covers multiple social and communication skills—things like building trust and connection, communicating your message clearly and powerfully, addressing disagreements without a fight, and promoting change in a variety of settings, at home, school, and work. Bottom line? Relationship Management is about taking what you know about yourself (self-awareness) and what you feel for others (empathy) and turning that into positive interactions with those around you.

Conclusion

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is an essential skill for genuine, lasting success. Without it, attempts at inner growth become mere wishful thinking that fails when the pressure mounts. And outer growth results in shallow relationships that lack the trust necessary for long-term progress and achievement. Emotional intelligence links your inner strength to your outer results, establishing a mechanism that accelerates both personal growth and professional success.

December 30, 2025
Mastering STEM: 3 Keys to Success Beyond ‘Natural Genius’
There’s a persistent myth in Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM): that success belongs to the “natural genius,” the person who just “gets it.”

Here’s the truth: Achieving mastery in challenging STEM fields has little to do with some magical, intrinsic gift. It is 100% based on the application of several advanced intellectual and behavioral strategies. Think of it as a complete operating system upgrade for your brain.

To move beyond the daily struggles and achieve genuine mastery in STEM, you need to commit to these three non-negotiable principles.

The Power of Modeling

Social Learning Theory, pioneered by Albert Bandura, shows that a huge part of human learning happens through observing and imitating others. But success isn’t about emulation (or copying) a single skill; it’s about modeling a complete system.

To succeed, you must actively observe and adopt the entire package of skills and habits from those who have already achieved high levels of success. For example:
- Advanced Technical Skills: How do experts and mentors break down a complex problem? Learn their analytical approaches.
- Powerful Work Ethic: Look at how they meticulously structure their study schedules, their uncompromising standards for quality, and their consistent effort.
- Powerful, Positive Mindset: How do they view failure? It’s purely objective, instructive data—nothing more.
Take action, stop focusing solely on the textbook content. Start noting the process of your most successful peers or mentors. How do they organize? When and how do they study? How do they handle a major setback? You want to copy and implement a system, not just learn content knowledge.

Escaping the “Developmental Trap.”

A massive barrier to our progress is what is called the “developmental trap.” This is when you inadvertently become rooted in ineffective behavioral patterns that feel comfortable but sabotage your future.

Are you chronically procrastinating? Do you find fault in everything you do, seeing only the negative outcomes, which paralyzes you from even starting? Are you habitually unclear about your goals and intentions, or vague in your communication with your fellow students/teachers/professors? These are self-sabotaging habits.

To break free, you must perform a conscious, honest self-assessment and start developing and exercising your self-awareness skills.

Follow-up on your self-assessment by:
- Installing these productive habits: Resilience (bouncing back from setbacks with renewed effort) and a rigorous work ethic (getting things done with uncompromising quality and efficiency).
- Discard low-return behaviors: Self-incrimination, self-doubt, and negativity.
Over time, your relentless effort will help create a powerful “internal compass.” Your motivation shifts from the temporary need for external validation (a good grade, a compliment) to an intrinsic drive—a non-negotiable, standard you’ve set for quality and thoroughness that you must meet, regardless of what anyone else thinks.

Prioritize the Process Over the Score

The final, and perhaps most crucial, mental adjustment is letting go of the destructive notion that you must achieve absolute, flaw-free perfection. That ideal is unattainable and will only lead to burnout.

The successful STEM student must value the process of learning and discovery over the final numerical score or grade.

When an experiment fails, a line of code breaks, or you get a subpar result on a quiz, how you react must change. Don’t view it as a “mess-up” or that you don’t have what it takes to “make it.” Instead, you must treat it as a starting point from which you learn and progress.

This data is essential for:
1. Precisely identifying your weaknesses.
2. Fine-tuning your approach to solving the problem or issue.
3. Educating you for the design of your future, a more refined attempt.
This mental shift is life-changing. It moves your focus from avoiding mistakes (a fear-based approach) to maximizing learning effectiveness (a growth-based approach.)

Summary

In the demanding world of STEM, setbacks—from experimental failures to complex problem-solving roadblocks and challenging coursework—are a daily certainty. Therefore, the single most critical factor for your long-term success and ultimate perseverance is your ability to effectively manage and recalibrate your expectations.

Really successful STEM students ditch the idea that they have to be absolutely perfect. They focus more on consistently putting in the hard work and sticking closely to the process (understanding the “why” and the “how”), instead of getting hung up on immediate, flawless results. This mindset change is a huge win: it means they stop seeing mistakes as a huge personal flaw and start seeing them as valuable, objective data—the stuff you need for real learning, figuring out new strategies, and improving down the line. In the end, this shift turns anxiety into a powerful tool for growth.
November 30, 2025
Essential Skills for Success in STEM: Initiative, Resolve, Perseverance, Resilience

You may be doing well in your math and science courses, or perhaps you’re already interested in areas such as computer programming, robotics, or video game design. While a passion for STEM and strong academic performance are certainly vital, true success in these fields requires more than just intelligence.

The key drivers—the qualities that will propel you through challenging projects, demanding courses, and even career setbacks—are the four absolutely vital tools in your personal growth toolkit for anyone charting a course in STEM: Initiative, Resolve, Perseverance, and Resilience.

What is Initiative, Resolve, Perseverance, and Resilience?

1. Initiative

What it is: The ability to self-start, take action without being told, and seek out new opportunities or skills.

Why it matters in STEM: The STEM fields are constantly evolving. What you learn today may be outdated in five years. Initiative is crucial for lifelong learning—the willingness to constantly teach yourself new skills (computer programming, robotics, advanced data analysis, or new analytical instrumentation) to remain current and competitive in the industry.

When performing research or problem-solving, it takes initiative to troubleshoot errors, design a better experiment, or learn to use a new piece of equipment before it’s required. It’s what drives you to excel.

Example: Your Chemistry professor assigns an open-ended laboratory project. The explicit expectation is a successful, unique final product. You must show the initiative to search for resources, organize the necessary equipment and reagents, and learn to operate the necessary tools needed to complete the project because the assignment demands it, not just because you feel like it.

2. Resolve

What it is: A firm determination to achieve a specific goal, resisting distractions, and maintaining focus even when things get tough. The unwavering focus needed to complete a difficult project, solve a complex equation, or commit to the years of study required for a specialized field of study.

Why it matters in STEM: STEM fields demand long-term commitment. Resolve is what helps you stay committed to completing that difficult assignment, even when exhaustion hits. Push through a difficult physics derivation, knowing the understanding will unlock new perspectives. See past a frustrating semester or a challenging first-year chemistry, physics, or math course, reminding you of your ultimate career aspirations. It’s the inner conviction that keeps you on track.

Example: Introductory college courses, such as Organic Chemistry, Physics, and Calculus, are often intentionally challenging to test your preparedness to succeed in upper level courses. When faced with a low grade, resolve is the quality that prevents you from abandoning your major. Initiative is the drive to seek out help by finding a tutor, joining a study group, or meeting with the professor to grasp the material you do not understand, instead of simply giving up.

3. Perseverance

What it is: The sustained effort to keep working despite difficulties, serving as the dedication required to solve tough problems through hours of calculations, research, or repeated experiments. It’s the long-term, consistent effort.

Why it matters in STEM: STEM is rarely a straight line to success. Perseverance means spending countless hours debugging computer programming, even when you’re convinced it’s flawless. Re-running an experiment five times because you’re confident there’s a pattern you’re missing. Staying up late to understand a complex mathematical concept until it finally clicks.

Example: You struggle with a Chemistry laboratory assignment and are tempted to give up. Your instructor intervenes, not by giving you the answer, but by offering a small suggestion, confirming the difficulty of the task, and requiring you to follow up in an hour. This structured support prevents you from feeling abandoned in your efforts, reinforces the importance of struggle, and teaches you the value of perseverance.

While the ultimate decision to continue is yours, external factors, the support from your instructor, are essential. The setting of an expectation, the modelling of how to continue in the process, and the structured support act as powerful motivations, transforming your ability to just keep going into an established, automatic behavior (perseverance).

4. Resilience

What it is: The capacity to recover quickly from setbacks, disappointments, or outright failures, viewing setbacks not as defining moments but as valuable data and learning opportunities.

Why it matters in STEM: Failure isn’t a setback in STEM; it’s a feature. Scientific discovery often involves many “failed” experiments before a breakthrough. Resilience allows you to: bounce back from a low test score, analyze what went wrong, and adjust your study habits.

Example: It can be challenging for you to picture what “resilience” looks like. Mentors provide a crucial model. When you witness your research advisor’s experiment fail, and instead of getting discouraged, your advisor calmly analyzes the data, identifies the potential sources of error, and immediately starts correcting the issues for the next trial run. These actions model resilience and teaches you how to respond appropriately to setbacks.

STEM fields are characterized by constant challenges and an emphasis on complex problem-solving. Success relies less on your natural talent and more on your willingness to engage in a productive learning process. And that success rarely comes on the first try. It is common for an experiment to produce unexpected results or a mathematical proof to contain an error. Instead of seeing these setbacks as personal shortcomings, students need the mindsets of resilience and perseverance to see a failure as a starting point.

Is Initiative, Resolve, Perseverance, and Resilience a Personality Trait or a Learned Skill?

Initiative, resolve, perseverance, and resilience are generally understood as learned behaviors. Psychologists like Carol Dweck argue that these qualities stem from a Growth Mindset—the belief that our abilities and intelligence can be developed, rather than a fixed personality trait. While some people might appear naturally more determined to manage and learn from their struggles, everyone has the capacity to develop these essential skills.

Think of initiative, resolve, perseverance, and resilience as learned skills that, when practiced consistently, become an integral, defining part of your character or personality. For a STEM student, it is critical to recognize the value in treating them as skills that require deliberate practice.

The Power of Role Models, Mentors, and External Expectations

The skills of initiative, resolve, perseverance, and resilience isn’t something you can achieve entirely on your own, however you can always begin the process. The most effective and the smoothest path to growth in these areas requires external guidance. Role models, mentors, and the right external expectations act as a vital catalyst in forging these qualities.

How do role models, mentors, and external expectations cultivate these critical skills? Here are four key examples:

Observation: Professors, Mentors, and Role Models provide critical “how-to” knowledge. Observing an experienced chemist handle an instrument failure calmly or a scientist gracefully accept and learn from a failed experiment offers a real-world demonstration of resilience and perseverance in action.

Accountability: External expectations, whether it is from a professor, mentor, or a course syllabus, establish defined goals and deadlines that require action. Taking on a challenging project with its external pressures, its deadlines and reporting requirements, serves as a catalyst. It triggers the initiative needed to start and, crucially, builds the internal resolve and strength required for sustained effort toward completion.

A Defined Strategy for Success: Effective teachers and mentors avoid simply giving answers. Instead, they offer focused, constructive feedback, guide individuals through roadblocks, and recognize small achievements. This strategic support reinforces successful behaviors, driving long-term competence and success.

Reinforcement and Feedback: These critical skills are only learned effectively when you receive balanced feedback from your professors and mentors, parents as well – positive reinforcement when you suceed and constructive criticism when you fall short.

A Strategy for Your Personal Growth and Success

As you navigate your academic life and plan for a career in science, technology, engineering, or math, your focus must extend beyond formulas and facts. You need to actively look for opportunities to develop your initiative, resolve, perseverance, and resilience. So take action with the following approach:

1. Embrace the Hard Stuff: Never shy away from difficult assignments or complex projects. Challenges are opportunities in disguise.

2. Treat Failures as Data: Every setback is not an end, but a valuable data point. Analyze what went wrong and adjust your approach.

3. Actively Seek Mentors: Find someone whose approach to challenges inspires you, and commit to learning from their wisdom and experience.

4. Practice Self-Reflection: When things get tough, take a moment to ask yourself: How did I react? What could I do differently next time?

Conclusion

These qualities are not just career buzzwords; they are the foundation of personal growth and the essential fuel for scientific discovery and innovation. The combination of strong grades and these four psychological attributes is what ultimately separates a good student from future success in their career path, capable of making a difference in a STEM field. Cultivate them, and you will do more than just succeed in STEM; you will thrive in every aspect of your life.

November 19, 2025
Self-assessment Exercise Four: Practicing the Art of Self-reflection and Evaluating Your Openness for Change

For your consideration:

“You know, to be able to do something great in your life, you’re gonna have to realize your failures. You’re gonna have to embrace them and figure out how to overcome it.”

– Dave Chappelle

Introduction

Honest self-reflection is a precursor to self-awareness and the starting point for our discussion of personal growth. To start to know yourself, you need to consider who you are and what’s important to you at this point in your life. This is the final of four exercises designed to encourage you to take the time to think about and identify your goals and motivations. This exercise is designed to help you understand the forces driving your pursuit of a key personal or professional goal. It may help you know yourself better, figure out your goals, and make more informed decisions about your future. It may also help you to develop a stronger sense of purpose and direction in life.

Key Points to Remember

Be honest with yourself; there are no right or wrong answers, and no judgment is attached to your responses.

Take your time with these exercises, thinking about what is important to you and why.

As you work through each prompt, take a moment to record your thoughts. These reflections serve as a valuable resource when developing self-awareness.

Self-reflection and Your Openness for Change

Prompts

Prompt #1:

Think back over the past year. List one thing that you wish you could do over. Did you react harshly to a person’s comments or criticize someone unfairly? Were you given an opportunity to display your talents and skills or asked to do something meaningful and, for whatever reason, failed to meet expectations? Is there a decision you made whose consequences did you more harm than good? If so, what did you learn from the situation? What could you have done differently? If this is a repeating occurrence or behavior, are you willing to and how do you intend to change your behavior in the future?

Prompt #2:

Is there someone in your past who has left a lasting impression due to their constant support and guidance? This person consistently stood by you during times of need, providing advice, emotional and financial assistance, all without expecting anything in return. Someone who may not have said what you wanted to hear at the time, but precisely what you needed to hear. How did you respond to their guidance: were you grateful for their wisdom, or did you harbor resentment? Do you consider this person to be a role model for you? If so, how have these interactions changed your perspective on life and working with others?

Prompt #3

List three things you value most regarding your personal growth, for example: Faith, Family, Financial Freedom, Recognition, Success. Now, look back at the past 2 weeks, what was your time investment on your personal growth process? How many hours did you dedicate to activities directly serving these three values? Which activity or relationship gave you the greatest sense of satisfaction or positive reinforcement (exothermic growth)? Was there a drain on your energy levels (endothermic growth)? What activity or relationship consumed the most of your emotional or mental energy, often leaving you depleted?

Self-assessment Conclusion

You’ve completed the vital work of moving from self-reflection to action by honestly considering answering these questions. You’ve identified and acknowledged any recurring failures and regrets (Prompt #1), influential mentors and guidance in your life (Prompt #2), and, most importantly, evaluated your personal energy investment (Prompt #3).

As discussed in a previous blog post, the Law of Conservation of Energy applies to personal growth: you cannot generate more personal energy; you can only reallocate it to different endeavors.

Your life is subject to this law. Every time you dedicate mental or emotional energy to low-value activities or relationships that drain you, you’re experiencing endothermic growth; that energy is simply lost.

Conversely, when you commit to activities aligned with your most important values—such as your faith, mastering concepts or talents, your family, or financial desires – you’re exhibiting exothermic personal growth. You’re releasing your stored personal energy, producing serious personal growth. While these endeavors may be challenging in the moment, this process (perseverance and resilience) builds the person you truly desire to be.

With the four parts of your self-assessment now complete and your answers identified, the crucial next step is to actively pursue the traits, habits, and desires that will help you become your best self. We all need, no, we all must, stop passively waiting for change. So utilize this blueprint of your values and begin, right now, to invest your personal energy in becoming the person you desire to be.

October 26, 2025
The Personal Growth/Chemical Reaction Analogy

Key Concepts

Key Concept Number One: The Law of Conservation of Energy

The law of conservation of energy applies directly to our campfire analogy by stating that all the chemical potential energy stored in the wood must be accounted for after it burns—it doesn’t just disappear, it’s simply transformed into different forms. The total energy of the heat, light, and the chemical bonds of all the byproducts is equal to the original chemical potential energy stored in the wood. No energy is lost; it has just been converted.

In our discussion of the process of personal growth, the conservation of energy also applies. The personal energy we invest in the process — our time, focus, and emotion — is finite and must be transformed into something: either a product (your desired outcome of success) or byproducts (either intended (positive) or unintended (negative) emotional or psychological consequences of the process).

Key Concept Number Two: The Definition and Role of an Indicator

An Indicator in our chemical reaction/personal growth analogy is a measurable, observable, and immediate sign that the reaction mechanism is proceeding effectively and that the energy input (activation energy) is being successfully converted into the desired products. Essentially, it tells you if and how well the process is working.

The indicator in our campfire analogy is a sustained flame producing heat and light. This is the visual and thermal evidence that the wood’s stored chemical energy is successfully converting into usable thermal and radiant energy (Heat and Light). It immediately informs us that the Activation Energy (the match/lighter) was successful and the Reaction Mechanism (the burning of the reactants) is self-sustaining.

In the process of personal growth, self-awareness acts as an indicator. It is the ability to recognize and reflect on the state of our emotions, how effective we are in our learning process (informing us if our study habits/self-discipline are effective), and understand our behaviors. Without self-awareness, personal growth becomes a random and inefficient endeavor. It’s like “throwing ideas up against the wall to see what sticks,” a process that lacks crucial elements. This leads to a frustrating trial-and-error approach, wasting valuable time and energy.

Therefore, self-awareness is the foundational component of our personal growth, enabling us to identify and appreciate new skills, confidence, and competence as they emerge. Simultaneously, self-awareness is crucial for detecting and managing negative byproducts like stress, frustration, or burnout, preventing them from halting the entire growth process.

Breaking Down the Components of Our Campfire vs Personal Growth Analogy

Let’s define start by defining our chemical reaction process as the following:

Reactants + Catalyst + Activation Energy – Initiates – Reaction Mechanism – Yields – Products + Byproducts

Supplies

What items in the campfire example or which skills in the case of personal growth, do we need to accumulate before starting each process?

For the campfire analogy, we need: paper and kindling (small twigs and branches) to get the fire started, larger pieces of wood (logs) to serve as the fuel, and matches or a lighter to introduce heat to ignite the flame.

Personal growth demands a combination of essential resources and skills. Essential supplies include strong communication, critical thinking, and time management skills. Additionally, we need an inherent sense of personal accountability and access to various resources such as time, money, and mentors. Information resources, whether online, textbooks, or coursework, are also crucial. Finally, a secure and supportive environment is vital for this process.

Personal Commentary – The Importance of a Safe, Secure, and Supportive Environment

During my tine teaching middle school science, I was mentored by a teacher who advocated for a pass/fail grading policy for students during their middle school years, grades 6-8. He believed that the significant emotional and developmental changes experienced by students aged 12-15 made it more important to focus on building essential communication, study, time management and critical thinking skills rather than pressuring them with specific grade requirements. He also pointed out the growing number of students facing poverty, living in single-parent homes, living in fear of abuse, and dealing with various crises, leading to a lack of sufficient rest, parental support, and proper nutrition. Citing Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs theory, he argued that these stressors needed to be addressed before students could be expected to achieve academic excellence in the classroom.

Reactants (Campfire vs the Process of Personal Growth Analogy)

For our campfire analogy, the reactants are straightforward; they consist of wood (fuel), which is the source of stored potential energy, and oxygen.

Personal growth is fueled by key personality traits. These “reactants” include creativity, an open-mindedness to new ideas, a passion for learning and problem-solving, and the crucial ability to persevere through obstacles.

Indicators

In the campfire analogy, the sustained flame’s heat and light serve as the indicator, visually confirming the reaction is occurring and progressing.

Self-awareness serves as a crucial metric for our dedication to personal growth. This dedication is shaped by our curiosity, persistence, and the joy we experience from the process, As lifelong learners, our progress in these areas can be measured through our academic or career achievements.

Activation Energy

In the campfire analogy, the initial heat needed to ignite the paper or kindling acts as the activation energy for the combustion reaction. This reaction involves the burning of fuel (wood) in the presence of oxygen, which produces heat and light. A flame from a lighter or matches provides this initial activation energy, initiating the reaction. Once started, the heat generated by the burning wood sustains the reaction, causing subsequent additions of fuel to ignite.

Personal growth begins with activation energy—our initial investment of effort, time, and focus. This crucial first step helps us overcome our reluctance to start new projects, defeat self-doubt, and combat our natural inertia, our resistance towards change. It requires aligning our personal goals with both our internal motivations, our drive to engage in an activity purely for the inherent pleasure, satisfaction, or challenge it provides, and external motivations, our drive to perform an activity in order to achieve rewards, praise, money, grades, status, or to avoid negative consequences (like failing a class, being grounded, or later in life, getting fired from our job).

Catalysts

(Important: by definition,a catalyst is never used up or depleted in the reaction process.)

If you have ever had to build a campfire you may recognize this catalyst in the campfire analogy, it is the absolute dependence on the flow of air around and through the campfire itself. This airflow is the mechanism that speed up the process of burning, providing access to the oxygen crucial to the combustion process.

Personal growth is driven by catalysts, which include the foundational steps of the personal growth “building” we discussed in a previous blog post, our dreams, aspirations, and goals. These are combined with both intrinsic expectations (how we expect ourselves to progress) and extrinsic expectations (the expectations of family and others) to propel us forward in our personal growth journey.

Reaction Mechanism

In chemistry, a reaction mechanism is the step-by-step sequence of elementary reactions that leads from reactants to products. It’s the detailed path the reaction takes. When we apply this to personal growth, the reaction mechanism is not a single, fixed procedure but a continuous, self-correcting process.

In our campfire analogy, the reaction process is a combustion reaction, the process of combining fuel and oxygen with the activation energy provided by the match or a lighter, to initiate a chemical reaction that produces heat and light as products.

Personal growth is a journey towards a goal or personal transformation, much like a chemical reaction. It involves a methodical process of learning, similar to the scientific method, where knowledge is gained and applied through observation. This leads to the development of strategies, which are then implemented through habits, discipline, and focus to transform effort into skill. Ultimately, this process enables us to identify and conquer obstacles.

Products

We define a product as the desired output of a process, or the desired outcome of success.

In the campfire analogy, the products are heat (thermal energy) and light.

The desired outcome of personal growth is multifaceted, encompassing skills and competencies, such as mastering a trade, or individual definitions of success, like a specific title or salary. Ultimately, however, I would argue, we should strive in the long-term to gain in wisdom.

Byproducts

A campfire’s combustion reaction produces unintended and undesirable byproducts: ashes, which are mineral waste, and smoke, a form of air pollution consisting of uncombusted particles.

Our personal growth journey, unlike a chemical reaction, yields byproducts that can be either positive or negative, depending on the nature of the growth itself. When we engage in what we call “exothermic growth,” our investment of personal energy results in a positive return or outcome. This beneficial growth produces desirable byproducts such as compassion, critical thinking skills, humility, and resiliency.

Conversely, “endothermic growth” occurs when we invest more personal energy than we receive in return. This imbalance can lead to negative, unintended emotional or psychological consequences, including anxiety, burnout, fear, frustration, and stress.

Therefore, self-awareness is crucial. It enables us to identify and prioritize rewarding, exothermic activities while simultaneously recognizing and minimizing endothermic activities that drain our personal energy and are misaligned with our personal goals and ambitions.

Conclusion

In conclusion, just like a well-tended campfire provides warmth and light, a mindful approach to personal growth can yield profound and lasting benefits. By understanding the “chemistry” of our own development—recognizing the needed components, our supplies, reactants, and the crucial role of activation energy and catalysts—we can more effectively guide our journey. Cultivating self-awareness allows us to prioritize “exothermic growth” and minimize the less desirable “endothermic” byproducts, ensuring our personal evolution is not only productive but also sustainable and deeply rewarding.

October 13, 2025
Weekly Quotation: October 7, 2025: The Power of Humility and Wisdom

For your consideration:

The moment we believe that success is determined by an ingrained level of ability as opposed to resilience and hard work, we will be brittle in the face of adversity.

– Joshua Waitzkin

I believe we are all endowed by God with unique gifts and abilities. Our professional and personal success is determined by how we embrace the responsibilities that accompany these blessings. From my experience, the belief that one is the “smartest person in the room,” based on a misguided self-assessment or external validation, such as our parents for example, and therefore we don’t need to make an investment of time and effort in our own success, is pure arrogance and a path to failure.

Throughout my life, I’ve made the mistake of thinking I didn’t need to put in the effort, acknowledge my shortcomings, or address my weaknesses by seeking counsel from more knowledgeable and experienced individuals. Shamefully, I follow the same pattern too often. When I’m offered a new opportunity that challenges my present mindset, I throw myself wholeheartedly into gaining the knowledge needed to be successful. Yet, once I feel like I am recognized as an “expert” by my supervisors, coworkers, or, worse yet, my own perception of my abilities, I become arrogant, stop seeking the input of others, and start to think that my way is the only way. For every step forward along my path to personal success, I take two steps back.

Now in my sixties, I have lived enough life to understand that wisdom is a crucial component in facing adversity, in persevering through hard times, and in being resilient. Wisdom that comes through knowledge and experience. A wisdom I’ve found by rediscovering scripture, particularly the books of Psalms and Proverbs. Despite how the world and technology have evolved, the struggles we encounter as humans on our journey to becoming better people remain the same. We simply need to be humble enough to seek guidance beyond ourselves.

October 8, 2025
Weekly Quotation: October 1, 2025: Chemistry: My Journey From Struggle to Passion

For your consideration:

Chemistry is not torture but instead the amazing and beautiful science of stuff, and if you give it a chance, it will not only blow your mind but also give you a deeper understanding of your world.

– Hank Green

My initial perception of chemistry differed significantly from Hank Green’s. My unfortunate experience with Dr. Bill Sagar’s Organic I course and his synthesis lab at Centre College in the late 1970s was responsible for this perspective. I would have preferred a novocaine-free wisdom tooth extraction to repeating that freshman year course. The sheer volume of material on his exams, coupled with my inability to memorize and regurgitate facts, proved overwhelming. Furthermore, I found the compound syntheses in the lab impossible. While I excel at instrumental lab activities and compound extractions, Dr. Sagar’s lab experience was so disheartening that it nearly destroyed my desire for any further lab courses at Centre. Ultimately, that single course, in which I received a “D,” sealed my fate as a pre-med major.

A year later, Dr. John Walkup, who was the Chair of the Chemistry Division, and would become my mentor, presented a holistic view of chemistry in his courses. He emphasized the habits, traits, and skills crucial to be successful as a chemist. His approach inspired in me an appreciation and passion for chemistry in all areas, from Organic II (yes, I enrolled in and survived a second year of Organic, this time I got a “B”) to Physical Chemistry (a stunning blend of math and chemistry) and Instrumental Chemistry (which became my true love). We explored not just the how but also why reactions occurred, but also their application, their importance in different field of chemistry. We were taught to “think’ like a chemist, the importance of observation – recognizing strengths and weaknesses of a chemical process, then identifying the possible sources of error in our analyses.

After 35-plus years in various fields of chemistry, I strongly recommend to student pursuing a chemistry major or a broader STEM career that I tutor, to maintain an open mind throughout their science coursework. It will not always be an easy path to follow. You will encounter challenges, and there will be days when switching to business management or accounting might seem appealing. However, persevere. Have faith in yourself. Seek out mentors, engage with your professors, learn their office hours, and visit frequently. While it may now always seem like it, I can assure you that chemistry is a beautiful field of study. It is both an art and a science, inviting you to experience the wonder and awe of the world around you.

October 1, 2025
Weekly Quotation: September 24, 2025: Embracing Resilience: Overcoming Life’s Challenges

For your consideration:

I think that life is difficult. People have challenges. Family members get sick, people get older, you don’t always get the job or the promotion that you want. You have conflicts in your life. And really, life is about your resilience and your ability to go through your life and all of the ups and downs with a positive attitude.

– Jennifer Hyman

After undergoing five spinal surgeries in the past twelve years, I’ve come to accept chronic pain as my new normal. I understand this is the hand I’ve been dealt and must manage it daily. My faith in God and my perspective on life are the only things I truly control. I lean into stoicism, focusing on what I can control: my emotions, my reactions to situations, and my demeanor. I accept what is beyond my control—the actions and behaviors of others, external events, and fate.

I strive to prevent my countenance from revealing my pain and discomfort, choosing not to complain about my situation. Instead, I try to be a concerned, interested, and active listener, showing compassion for others’ challenges. This path is not easy, but through prayer—asking for strength, wisdom, and compassion, and giving thanks for all of God’s blessings—I feel I am making progress toward becoming the best version of myself.

September 24, 2025
Using the Scientific Method to Overcome Adversity

Every one of us, at some point in our lives, will face adversity and failure. Times when we fall short of expectations, whether it is the expectations others have for us or the expectations we have for ourselves. As students, it may be a poor exam grade, an incomplete or missed assignment, or even failing a course. You may fail to get the ACT score you need, or fail to be admitted to the college you desire. As adults, we may face setbacks like a failed job interview or missing out on a position we covet. A negative annual performance review could mean not getting the raise you feel like you deserve. Relationships and marriages can fail, and communication breakdowns can leave us questioning what went wrong. Life inevitably brings challenges: the loss of loved ones, health concerns, retirement, and the realization that we’re not as young as we used to be. The key lies in how we choose to confront these difficulties.

The Scientific Method’s Role in Dealing With Adversity

Most of us are familiar with the scientific method, a cornerstone of science education from middle school through college. For those who need a refresher, the scientific method consists of five steps or actions: Observation, Question, Hypothesis, Experiment, and Analysis/Conclusions.

How Can I Use the Scientific Method to Deal With Adversity?

I would argue that the key step is observation, being able to separate yourself from the emotion and act as an outside viewer of the situation, watching without judgment. Observation combined with self-awareness, asking yourself, “What are my strengths?, “What are my weaknesses?”, and “What truly motivates me?” These are the essential principles in applying the scientific method to adversity. It’s the perspective that allows you to treat a challenge not as an attack on you, but as a problem to be solved.

Once you accept this attitude and put it into practice, the scientific method becomes a powerful tool for dealing with adversity, changing it from an emotional crisis into a manageable process of observation and experimentation.

Real-life Example: You get a “D” on your chemistry assignment.

Step One: Observation

Adversity strikes, and your first step is to resist the emotional pull to react immediately. We often make the situation worse by reacting without thinking, responding in ways we’ll come to regret later. Not just in our words, but in our actions and decisions we make in the moment. We need to take a step back and become an objective viewer of the situation at hand.

First, you observe the situation without being judgmental or emotional, asking yourself:

“What are the facts of this situation?”

Break the situation down, make an objective, non-emotional analysis. The assignment was due three days ago, and I submitted it today, three days late. The classroom policy is that for every day an assignment is late, there is a letter grade penalty.

“What are the emotions am I feeling?”

Angry, I worked really hard on this assignment. Embarrassed, all my friends got better grades than I did.

“What thoughts are running through my mind?”

My teacher is just being mean; he doesn’t like me, and he’s picking on me. And this policy is really unfair.

“What are the other variables at play?”

I spent my time playing a new video game I just got instead of working on the assignment. I struggle with procrastination, putting off all my assignments until the last minute.

As you gather information, treat your emotions and thoughts as “data” points rather than truths to be acted upon.

Step Two: Identify a Question

From this place of calm observation, you formulate a specific, solvable question. Instead of asking, “Why is this happening to me?”, you ask, “What is the real problem I need to solve here?” This question must be objective and actionable, similar to a chemist asking, “What are the souces of error causing this reaction to fail?”

For this situation, your core problem you need to solve is that you procrastinate.

Step Three: Create a Hypothesis

Next, you develop a theory about how to approach the problem. This is your educated guess about a potential solution. Your hypothesis is a path forward, a specific action you will take to test your theory. It might sound like this: “If I communicate my feelings calmly and clearly, then I can find a resolution to this conflict.” Or, “If I study more, then I will do better on my exam.”

Because you struggle with procrastination, you may decide to start on an assignment the day it is assigned, or do your work at the dining room table, not in your room where you’re easily distracted. Maybe ask your parents to help or ask a friend to be a “study buddy” to help keep you accountable.

Step Four: Perform an Experiment

This is where you put your hypothesis into action. You take a deliberate, measured step to test your theory. The experiment isn’t a rash decision; it’s a controlled action designed to provide data. You act or change your behavior, and you carefully observe the results.

For example, for the next assignment, you decide to test your hypothesis by starting the day it is assigned and doing your work at your kitchen table, not in your room.

Step Five: Analysis & Conclusion

After the experiment, you analyze the results. Did your new approach work? Did the situation improve, or did your emotions shift in a positive way?

Based on the analysis, you draw a conclusion. If your hypothesis was correct, you’ve found a new, effective way to handle that specific type of adversity. If it wasn’t, you haven’t failed; you’ve simply gathered new information. That new information allows you to formulate a new hypothesis and start the cycle over again.

While it is not always easy, assuming responsibility for our failures and admitting our shortcomings never is, by applying this systematic, analytical approach, you may find that adversity is no longer a personal attack. It becomes a solvable problem, and you become the master architect who learns from every challenge and uses that knowledge to become a stronger, more resilient you.

August 18, 2025