Musings of an Old Chemist

A Chemist's Perspective on the Habits and Skills STEM Students Need For Success

Tag: self-awareness

The Grade Illusion: Why High Test Scores Don’t Necessarily Equate With Concept Mastery (And How to Fix It)
If you are an aspiring STEM student, or the parent of one, I want you to consider a terrifying possibility: It is possible to have a 4.0 GPA and know/retain almost nothing.

I saw this contradiction in the students I would tutor. They were bright, hardworking, and ambitious. They had mastered the art of getting the “A.” They knew how to take tests, follow instructions, and allocate their time to receive a high score.

However, if I asked them to apply a physics concept from two weeks before to a new problem assigned that day, they would freeze. Their knowledge of the material (data) was gone.

This is the Grade Illusion. We have built an educational culture – especially in high-stakes fields like STEM, where the “High Score” has become the product. But in the real world, the test scores from high school and college courses are irrelevant. The only thing that matters is mastering the content.

If you want to survive the transition from “A-student” to “successful scientist,” you need to understand how your own mind works. You need to stop renting knowledge and start owning it.

The Knowledge Retention Misconception: RAM vs. Hard Drive

To understand why intelligent students often feel like impostors, we need to examine how the brain stores information.

Think of your brain like a computer. You have two types of storage:
1. RAM (Random Access Memory): This is short-term, high-speed memory storage. It holds the data you need right now. It is volatile; when the power cuts (or the test ends), the data is wiped to make room for the next task.
2. The Hard Drive: This is long-term storage. It is slower to write to, but the data remains there forever, ready to be recalled years later.
The modern educational system encourages you to use your RAM, not your Hard Drive. We call this Cramming, or as we discussed in an earlier blog post, the act of memorization/regurgitation.

When you cram for a calculus midterm, you are loading complex formulas into your RAM. You hold them there—stressfully—for 24 hours. You walk into the exam, dump the RAM onto the paper, and get a 95%. You feel successful.

But 48 hours later, that RAM is cleared to make space for Chemistry. The “Save to Hard Drive” function never happened.

The Science of Forgetting

This isn’t just a metaphor; it is a biological fact. In the late 19th century, psychologist Hermann Ebbinghaus mapped the “Forgetting Curve.”

The curve shows that without deep processing (the struggle necessary to understand something), humans lose roughly 50% of new information within a day and 90% within a week.

The student who crams and gets an “A” peaks at 100% on Tuesday morning. By next Tuesday, their retention dropped to nearly the same level as that of the student who failed. The grade is a record of what you knew for one hour, not what you carry into your career.

From an economics perspective, consider this as the difference between Renting and Owning.
- Cramming is Renting. You pay a high price in stress and sleep deprivation. You get to “live” in the knowledge for a day. But once the test is over, your “lease” is up, and you are evicted. You have zero equity.
- Deep Learning is Owning. You pay a “mortgage” of daily, consistent study. It feels slower. It feels harder. But two years later, when you are designing a load-bearing bridge, for example, that physics principle is yours.
The Illusion of Competence

“But I got an A!” you might argue. “The test says I know the material.”

Does it?

In 1956, in the publication “Taxonomy of Educational Objectives: The Classification of Educational Goals,” a committee of educators chaired by Benjamen Bloom developed a framework to rank levels of understanding called “Bloom’s Taxonomy.”

Shutterstock

Most high school tests—and frankly, many college exams—operate at the bottom three levels: Knowledge (learn the formula), Comprehension (understand when to use the formula), and Application (plug numbers into the formula).

If you are good at memorization, you can ace these tests without ever moving up the pyramid. But a career in STEM fields lives entirely at the top three levels:
- Analysis: Why did the experiment fail?
- Evaluation: Which method is best for this specific application?
- Synthesize (Create): Develop an improved solution that isn’t in the textbook.
The Illusion of Competence

This creates the Illusion of Competence. You have a transcript full of “A’s” that certify you are an expert, but your internal drive has never been stress-tested at the “Analysis” or “Synthesis” level. When you eventually hit a problem that requires those skills, you don’t just struggle—you crash.

The most dangerous side effect of the Grade Illusion isn’t academic; it’s psychological.

The Performance = Identity Misconception

When you spend your entire life chasing the “High Score,” you begin to associate your Performance with your Identity. You believe the equation: My Grade = My Worth.

In STEM, this is lethal. In English class, a grade of “C” might seem subjective. In Physics or Chemistry, a “wrong answer” is objectively wrong. If you tie your self-worth to getting the right answer, every mistake feels like a character flaw.

You need to adopt the mindset of a Scientist:
- You are the Learning Process itself. You are the curiosity, the work ethic, the resilience.
- The Grade is just Data. It is simply the output of a single, specific experiment on a single specific day.
For example, if a Ferrari engine performs poorly because it had bad fuel, we don’t say the engine is trash. We say the input (fuel) was wrong. Similarly, if you fail a test, it doesn’t mean you are broken. It means your variables—your study habits, your sleep, your preparation—were off.

A bad grade is not your identity. It is guidance.

Breaking the Cycle

Ready to shift from being a “Grade Hunter” to a true “Learner”? Use these two simple techniques to pinpoint where you are in that transition and determine the necessary steps to move forward.

1. The “Two-Week Audit.”

I challenge you to a challenging experiment. Take a test you aced two weeks ago. Sit down and take it right now, without reviewing your notes.

The difference between your score then (95%) and your score now (55%) is your Fake (Lost) Knowledge. That 40-point gap represents wasted energy. It is time spent renting, not owning. If the gap is huge, your study method is broken, regardless of your GPA.

2. The Feynman Technique (The Ownership Test)

Physicist Richard Feynman had a simple rule for understanding, which he borrowed from Albert Einstein. To prove you have mastered a concept, you must be able to explain it in simple language, without jargon, to someone who has no background in the topic (like a smart 12-year-old).

If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it. You have only memorized the definition. You are stuck at the bottom of Bloom’s Taxonomy.

The Bottom Line

The world is full of influencers and algorithms showing you the easy way to obtain a high test score on the ACT and achieve the most sought-after degrees, jobs, and accolades. Yet they rarely show you how to retain the knowledge required for long-term success.

Success in STEM requires three “old school” prerequisites that cannot be skipped: Curiosity, a Passion for Learning, and a Passion for Solving Problems.

If you have these, the grades will eventually follow. But more importantly, later in life, when the grades stop mattering, the expertise will remain.
January 4, 2026
Mastering Emotional Intelligence for Personal Growth

When we talk about the subject of personal growth, we usually split things into two buckets: “Inner” growth (a growth mindset, self-awareness, and resilience) and “Outer” growth (relationships, communication skills, achievements, and recognition). However, here’s the missing piece in our model: Emotional Intelligence (EQ). Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the bridge that unites these two separate ideas, preparing you to be successful as a functioning member of society, regardless of your chosen career path. Producing real-world success that people actually notice.

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) isn’t just about being nice; it is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions while recognizing and acknowledging the feelings of others. If your IQ measures your intelligence or book knowledge, EQ measures your people skills and self-control. It is the connection between thinking and feeling.

The Four Core Pillars of Emotional Intelligence (EQ)

Pillar #1: Self-awareness

In a previous blog post, we defined Self-Awareness as the GPS for our process of personal growth. And it is the absolute starting point for emotional intelligence (EQ). It’s all about understanding your own moods, feelings, what drives you, and how all that affects the people around you. To master this, you need to take an honest look at what you’re good at and what you struggle with, and feel genuinely confident in yourself. The key thing is, a self-aware person doesn’t just feel an emotion; they can actually figure out why they’re feeling frustrated, happy, or stressed. This deep internal check is the groundwork for everything else in emotional intelligence.

Pillar #2: Self-control

The second component, self-control (self-management), follows self-awareness. It is crucial for keeping destructive emotions and urges in check, so you can stay calm and collected, even when things get stressful. Think of it as emotional control—it’s that ability to hit the pause button between feeling an impulse and actually doing something about it. This pause allows you to make smart, principled decisions instead of just reacting impulsively or defensively. Self-management includes being flexible, taking initiative, and keeping a positive attitude in order to reach your goals, even when you face roadblocks.

Common Examples:

When receiving constructive criticism, someone with low emotional intelligence (EQ) might immediately become defensive, blame someone else for their mistake, or just give the person the silent treatment, which is not helpful. In contrast, a person with high emotional intelligence will pause, acknowledge that the criticism, while it may feel uncomfortable, is justified, and then ask what they need to do to improve, genuinely thanking the person for being honest.

When having a “bad day,” a person with low emotional intelligence stressed about a meeting or a deadline, might react by snapping at their parents, spouse, friend, or even someone in a restaurant or store, just because they are in the way. A highly emotionally intelligent response is to recognize the feeling of being overwhelmed and directly tell a partner, “I’m having a ridiculously stressful day and I’m a bit on edge. I need 20 minutes of quiet to de-stress so I don’t accidentally take it out on you.”

Pillar #3: Social Awareness

Social Awareness (Empathy) is the third key ability, which is shifting your focus away from yourself and focusing on others. This crucial skill enables you to sense, understand, and respond well to the emotional needs and concerns of those around you. Often described as being able to “read the room”, it requires you to see things from someone else’s perspective and grasp the mood of the situation. It goes beyond just seeing that someone is upset; strong social awareness helps you to understand why they are feeling that way, which is critical for great relationships and connecting with others.

For Example:

During a big disagreement, either at home, school, or at work, a person with low emotional intelligence makes their goal to “win” the argument and prove the other person is wrong. Conversely, a highly emotionally intelligent individual focuses on understanding the other person’s perspective, asking questions like, “Help me out here – why is this so important to you?” because they value the relationship more than being right.

Pillar #4: Building Relationships

Building Relationships is the final stage of emotional intelligence. It’s where you combine your emotional intelligence and social skills to manage complicated social situations, inspiring others. This is the top level of emotional intelligence, showing how well you can influence people, get them on board, and help them grow. It covers multiple social and communication skills—things like building trust and connection, communicating your message clearly and powerfully, addressing disagreements without a fight, and promoting change in a variety of settings, at home, school, and work. Bottom line? Relationship Management is about taking what you know about yourself (self-awareness) and what you feel for others (empathy) and turning that into positive interactions with those around you.

Conclusion

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is an essential skill for genuine, lasting success. Without it, attempts at inner growth become mere wishful thinking that fails when the pressure mounts. And outer growth results in shallow relationships that lack the trust necessary for long-term progress and achievement. Emotional intelligence links your inner strength to your outer results, establishing a mechanism that accelerates both personal growth and professional success.

December 30, 2025
Mastering STEM: 3 Keys to Success Beyond ‘Natural Genius’
There’s a persistent myth in Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM): that success belongs to the “natural genius,” the person who just “gets it.”

Here’s the truth: Achieving mastery in challenging STEM fields has little to do with some magical, intrinsic gift. It is 100% based on the application of several advanced intellectual and behavioral strategies. Think of it as a complete operating system upgrade for your brain.

To move beyond the daily struggles and achieve genuine mastery in STEM, you need to commit to these three non-negotiable principles.

The Power of Modeling

Social Learning Theory, pioneered by Albert Bandura, shows that a huge part of human learning happens through observing and imitating others. But success isn’t about emulation (or copying) a single skill; it’s about modeling a complete system.

To succeed, you must actively observe and adopt the entire package of skills and habits from those who have already achieved high levels of success. For example:
- Advanced Technical Skills: How do experts and mentors break down a complex problem? Learn their analytical approaches.
- Powerful Work Ethic: Look at how they meticulously structure their study schedules, their uncompromising standards for quality, and their consistent effort.
- Powerful, Positive Mindset: How do they view failure? It’s purely objective, instructive data—nothing more.
Take action, stop focusing solely on the textbook content. Start noting the process of your most successful peers or mentors. How do they organize? When and how do they study? How do they handle a major setback? You want to copy and implement a system, not just learn content knowledge.

Escaping the “Developmental Trap.”

A massive barrier to our progress is what is called the “developmental trap.” This is when you inadvertently become rooted in ineffective behavioral patterns that feel comfortable but sabotage your future.

Are you chronically procrastinating? Do you find fault in everything you do, seeing only the negative outcomes, which paralyzes you from even starting? Are you habitually unclear about your goals and intentions, or vague in your communication with your fellow students/teachers/professors? These are self-sabotaging habits.

To break free, you must perform a conscious, honest self-assessment and start developing and exercising your self-awareness skills.

Follow-up on your self-assessment by:
- Installing these productive habits: Resilience (bouncing back from setbacks with renewed effort) and a rigorous work ethic (getting things done with uncompromising quality and efficiency).
- Discard low-return behaviors: Self-incrimination, self-doubt, and negativity.
Over time, your relentless effort will help create a powerful “internal compass.” Your motivation shifts from the temporary need for external validation (a good grade, a compliment) to an intrinsic drive—a non-negotiable, standard you’ve set for quality and thoroughness that you must meet, regardless of what anyone else thinks.

Prioritize the Process Over the Score

The final, and perhaps most crucial, mental adjustment is letting go of the destructive notion that you must achieve absolute, flaw-free perfection. That ideal is unattainable and will only lead to burnout.

The successful STEM student must value the process of learning and discovery over the final numerical score or grade.

When an experiment fails, a line of code breaks, or you get a subpar result on a quiz, how you react must change. Don’t view it as a “mess-up” or that you don’t have what it takes to “make it.” Instead, you must treat it as a starting point from which you learn and progress.

This data is essential for:
1. Precisely identifying your weaknesses.
2. Fine-tuning your approach to solving the problem or issue.
3. Educating you for the design of your future, a more refined attempt.
This mental shift is life-changing. It moves your focus from avoiding mistakes (a fear-based approach) to maximizing learning effectiveness (a growth-based approach.)

Summary

In the demanding world of STEM, setbacks—from experimental failures to complex problem-solving roadblocks and challenging coursework—are a daily certainty. Therefore, the single most critical factor for your long-term success and ultimate perseverance is your ability to effectively manage and recalibrate your expectations.

Really successful STEM students ditch the idea that they have to be absolutely perfect. They focus more on consistently putting in the hard work and sticking closely to the process (understanding the “why” and the “how”), instead of getting hung up on immediate, flawless results. This mindset change is a huge win: it means they stop seeing mistakes as a huge personal flaw and start seeing them as valuable, objective data—the stuff you need for real learning, figuring out new strategies, and improving down the line. In the end, this shift turns anxiety into a powerful tool for growth.
November 30, 2025
Self-assessment Exercise Three: Identifying Your Expectations and Beliefs
For your consideration:

“Lower expectations do not lead to happiness, no matter how often they are met.”

– Michael Jordan

Introduction

Honest self-reflection is a precursor to self-awareness and the starting point for our discussion of personal growth. To start to know yourself, you need to consider who you are and what’s important to you at this point in your life. This is the third of four exercises designed to encourage you to take the time to think about and identify your goals and motivations. This exercise is designed to help you understand the forces driving your pursuit of a key personal or professional goal. It may help you know yourself better, figure out your goals, and make more informed decisions about your future. It may also help you to develop a stronger sense of purpose and direction in life.

Key Points to Remember
- Be honest with yourself; there are no right or wrong answers, and no judgment is attached to your responses.
- Take your time with these exercises, thinking about what is important to you and why.
- As you work through each prompt, take a moment to record your thoughts. These reflections serve as a valuable resource when developing self-awareness.
Expectations and Beliefs

Description of the Types of Expectations

Expectations can be broadly categorized into two types: internal (intrinsic) and external (extrinsic). While there are subtle distinctions between internal and intrinsic, and external and extrinsic, for clarity in this explanation, I will group them together.

Internal (intrinsic) Expectations

Internal (Intrinsic) expectations originate within you. These are the personal standards that influence your behavior, performance, and character. They can take various forms. These might include physical goals, such as training for a marathon; a commitment to daily habits like a 10-minute meditation; value-based principles like kindness and honesty; or quality standards, such as the expectation that your work will be perfect when you submit it.

Your motivation to meet these expectations stems from intrinsic factors such as your personal values, ambitions, self-worth, and the desire for self-improvement. The primary reason is often the desire to meet your own standards for mastering new content or ideas, exploring your passions and interests, your process of personal growth, and a sense of satisfaction. For instance, you might set an expectation to practice the guitar for an hour daily, motivated purely by the love of improving and the music itself, finding your reward in the satisfaction you receive from the activity.

External (extrinsic) Expectations

External (extrinsic) expectations originate from outside yourself. They are standards, rules, or requests set by other people, your parents, friends, coworkers, or society in general. For example: a deadline for a project (either in class or at work), your parents or a spouse’s request for you to do a specific household chore, a job description or class syllabus listing how your performance at work or class will be measured, or perhaps a societal standard on how you “should” behave, dress, or define success to be accepted. At its core, with external (extrinsic) expectations, your primary desire is often to meet the standards of others.

Accountability to others, the pursuit of rewards like promotions or praise, and the avoidance of negative consequences such as disapproval from parents, friends, or bosses, poor grades, or losing a job, are often key internal (intrinsic) motivators for meeting external expectations. External (extrinsic) motivations, by comparison, are generally less fluid and flexible because changing the expectations of others requires you to negotiate the terms of the expectations and seek agreement with another person.

Bottom Line

Your expectations need to be realistic and attainable, plus align with your personal goals and ambitions. You must remain true to yourself and your beliefs and core values, regardless of how difficult it may seem at times. Negotiating expectations is a major component of the personal growth process.

Prompts

Prompt #1:

Whose expectations have the strongest influence on your life, and that you feel obligated to meet? Are they aligned with your own beliefs and desires? How do you manage those expectations and stay true to your dreams and goals?

Prompt #2:

List three things you expect from yourself (for example, I expect myself to spend 30 minutes each day writing). How do these expectations impact your daily decisions and actions? Does meeting your expectations give you self-confidence and encourage you to do more? Or do these expectations overwhelm you?

Prompt #3:

Think about a recent time when you exceeded an expectation. Did you take time to acknowledge and celebrate that success? If not, why? Recognizing your “wins” is an important component of self-care.

Prompt #4:

Think about your expectations for others (friends, family, or people in general). Are these expectations realistic and attainable? How do they align with what you expect from yourself, your goals, and your beliefs?

Up Next: Practicing the Art of Self-reflection and Evaluating Your Openness for Change

The last set of prompts, part four of the series, will ask you to practice the art of self-reflection and evaluate your openness for change.
October 22, 2025
Self-assessment Exercise Two: Understanding Your Goals and Motivations
For your consideration:

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to just try one more time.”

– Thomas Edison

Introduction

Honest self-reflection is a precursor to self-awareness and the starting point for our discussion of personal growth. To start to know yourself, you need to consider who you are and what’s important to you at this point in your life. This is the second of four exercises designed to encourage you to take the time to think about and identify your goals and motivations. This exercise is designed to help you understand the forces driving your pursuit of a key personal or professional goal. It may help you understand yourself better, figure out your goals, and make more informed decisions about your future. It may also help you to develop a stronger sense of purpose and direction in life.

Key Points to Remember
- Be honest with yourself; there are no right or wrong answers, and no judgment is attached to your responses.
- Take your time with these exercises, thinking about what is important to you and why.
- As you work through each prompt, take a moment to record your thoughts. These reflections can serve as a valuable resource for developing self-awareness.
Goals and Motivations

A Quick Refresher Regarding the Types of Motivation

Intrinsic motivation is the drive that comes from within. You do it because the act itself is enjoyable, satisfying, or aligns with your core values and sense of purpose (e.g., learning a skill because you are passionate about learning, solving a puzzle for the challenge).

Extrinsic motivation is the drive that derives from external factors. You do it for a separable outcome, like a reward, recognition, status, or to avoid punishment (e.g., working hard for a bonus, getting a degree to impress others).

Healthy motivation is often a blend of both, but an over-reliance on extrinsic factors can be unsustainable and lead to burnout.

Prompts

Prompt #1:

Choose one significant goal you are currently working towards regarding your personal success or growth. Describe it in one or two clear sentences.

Prompt #2:

List the things that truly motivate you to achieve this goal. Are they intrinsic motivations (lead to a sense of accomplishment or happiness) or extrinsic (money, job title, or recognition). How did these motivations influence your selection of this goal?

Prompt #3:

Think of a past achievement you’re proud of. What motivated you in this endeavor, and how did it make you feel to achieve it?

Prompt #4:

Think of a time you overcame an unexpected challenge or setback. What motivated you to keep going? What did you learn from that experience? How, if any, has it changed the way you set goals in the future?

Up Next: Expectations and Beliefs

The next set of prompts, part three of the series, will ask you to examine your expectations and your belief system.
October 19, 2025
Self-assessment Exercise One: Identifying Your Dreams and Aspirations
For your consideration:

“The only thing that stands between you and your dream is the will to try and the belief that it is actually possible.”

– Joel Brown

Introduction

Honest self-reflection is a precursor to self-awareness and the starting point for our discussion of personal growth. To start to know yourself, you need to consider who you are and what’s important to you at this point in your life. This is the first of four exercises designed to encourage you to take the time to think about and identify your dreams, aspirations, motivations, and expectations. It may help you understand yourself better, figure out your goals, and make more informed decisions about your future. It may also help you to develop a stronger sense of purpose and direction in life.

Key Points to Remember:
- Be honest with yourself; there are no right or wrong answers, and no judgment is attached to your responses.
- Take your time with each prompt, thinking about what is important to you and why.
- As you work through each prompt, take a moment to record your thoughts. These reflections can serve as a valuable resource for developing self-awareness.
Dreams and Aspirations

Prompt #1:

Consider how your dreams define you. Is there a childhood dream that you still hold onto? Ask yourself, why is it important to me? How would it feel to make that dream come true, and what sacrifices would you need to make (if any) to get there?

Prompt #2:

Ask yourself, “What am I currently passionate about?, and “What activities/responsibilities give me the most energy and satisfaction?, Who or what do I aspire to be or to do?” Does your happiness depend on living the life or career of your dreams?

Prompt #3:

In the next 5 years, what specific achievement, title, or position must I accomplish, what impact must I have for my family, in my field of study, or in the world in general, that would represent the highest level of success and sense of self-fulfillment for me?

Prompt #4:

“What current skills, knowledge, or resources do I possess that will help me achieve this aspiration, and what key areas do I need to develop or acquire?” And, what is my plan to achieve those goals?

Up Next: Goals and Motivation

The next set of prompts, part two of the series, will ask you to identify and understand what motivates you to achieve goals you have set for yourself.
October 15, 2025
The Personal Growth/Chemical Reaction Analogy

Key Concepts

Key Concept Number One: The Law of Conservation of Energy

The law of conservation of energy applies directly to our campfire analogy by stating that all the chemical potential energy stored in the wood must be accounted for after it burns—it doesn’t just disappear, it’s simply transformed into different forms. The total energy of the heat, light, and the chemical bonds of all the byproducts is equal to the original chemical potential energy stored in the wood. No energy is lost; it has just been converted.

In our discussion of the process of personal growth, the conservation of energy also applies. The personal energy we invest in the process — our time, focus, and emotion — is finite and must be transformed into something: either a product (your desired outcome of success) or byproducts (either intended (positive) or unintended (negative) emotional or psychological consequences of the process).

Key Concept Number Two: The Definition and Role of an Indicator

An Indicator in our chemical reaction/personal growth analogy is a measurable, observable, and immediate sign that the reaction mechanism is proceeding effectively and that the energy input (activation energy) is being successfully converted into the desired products. Essentially, it tells you if and how well the process is working.

The indicator in our campfire analogy is a sustained flame producing heat and light. This is the visual and thermal evidence that the wood’s stored chemical energy is successfully converting into usable thermal and radiant energy (Heat and Light). It immediately informs us that the Activation Energy (the match/lighter) was successful and the Reaction Mechanism (the burning of the reactants) is self-sustaining.

In the process of personal growth, self-awareness acts as an indicator. It is the ability to recognize and reflect on the state of our emotions, how effective we are in our learning process (informing us if our study habits/self-discipline are effective), and understand our behaviors. Without self-awareness, personal growth becomes a random and inefficient endeavor. It’s like “throwing ideas up against the wall to see what sticks,” a process that lacks crucial elements. This leads to a frustrating trial-and-error approach, wasting valuable time and energy.

Therefore, self-awareness is the foundational component of our personal growth, enabling us to identify and appreciate new skills, confidence, and competence as they emerge. Simultaneously, self-awareness is crucial for detecting and managing negative byproducts like stress, frustration, or burnout, preventing them from halting the entire growth process.

Breaking Down the Components of Our Campfire vs Personal Growth Analogy

Let’s define start by defining our chemical reaction process as the following:

Reactants + Catalyst + Activation Energy – Initiates – Reaction Mechanism – Yields – Products + Byproducts

Supplies

What items in the campfire example or which skills in the case of personal growth, do we need to accumulate before starting each process?

For the campfire analogy, we need: paper and kindling (small twigs and branches) to get the fire started, larger pieces of wood (logs) to serve as the fuel, and matches or a lighter to introduce heat to ignite the flame.

Personal growth demands a combination of essential resources and skills. Essential supplies include strong communication, critical thinking, and time management skills. Additionally, we need an inherent sense of personal accountability and access to various resources such as time, money, and mentors. Information resources, whether online, textbooks, or coursework, are also crucial. Finally, a secure and supportive environment is vital for this process.

Personal Commentary – The Importance of a Safe, Secure, and Supportive Environment

During my tine teaching middle school science, I was mentored by a teacher who advocated for a pass/fail grading policy for students during their middle school years, grades 6-8. He believed that the significant emotional and developmental changes experienced by students aged 12-15 made it more important to focus on building essential communication, study, time management and critical thinking skills rather than pressuring them with specific grade requirements. He also pointed out the growing number of students facing poverty, living in single-parent homes, living in fear of abuse, and dealing with various crises, leading to a lack of sufficient rest, parental support, and proper nutrition. Citing Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs theory, he argued that these stressors needed to be addressed before students could be expected to achieve academic excellence in the classroom.

Reactants (Campfire vs the Process of Personal Growth Analogy)

For our campfire analogy, the reactants are straightforward; they consist of wood (fuel), which is the source of stored potential energy, and oxygen.

Personal growth is fueled by key personality traits. These “reactants” include creativity, an open-mindedness to new ideas, a passion for learning and problem-solving, and the crucial ability to persevere through obstacles.

Indicators

In the campfire analogy, the sustained flame’s heat and light serve as the indicator, visually confirming the reaction is occurring and progressing.

Self-awareness serves as a crucial metric for our dedication to personal growth. This dedication is shaped by our curiosity, persistence, and the joy we experience from the process, As lifelong learners, our progress in these areas can be measured through our academic or career achievements.

Activation Energy

In the campfire analogy, the initial heat needed to ignite the paper or kindling acts as the activation energy for the combustion reaction. This reaction involves the burning of fuel (wood) in the presence of oxygen, which produces heat and light. A flame from a lighter or matches provides this initial activation energy, initiating the reaction. Once started, the heat generated by the burning wood sustains the reaction, causing subsequent additions of fuel to ignite.

Personal growth begins with activation energy—our initial investment of effort, time, and focus. This crucial first step helps us overcome our reluctance to start new projects, defeat self-doubt, and combat our natural inertia, our resistance towards change. It requires aligning our personal goals with both our internal motivations, our drive to engage in an activity purely for the inherent pleasure, satisfaction, or challenge it provides, and external motivations, our drive to perform an activity in order to achieve rewards, praise, money, grades, status, or to avoid negative consequences (like failing a class, being grounded, or later in life, getting fired from our job).

Catalysts

(Important: by definition,a catalyst is never used up or depleted in the reaction process.)

If you have ever had to build a campfire you may recognize this catalyst in the campfire analogy, it is the absolute dependence on the flow of air around and through the campfire itself. This airflow is the mechanism that speed up the process of burning, providing access to the oxygen crucial to the combustion process.

Personal growth is driven by catalysts, which include the foundational steps of the personal growth “building” we discussed in a previous blog post, our dreams, aspirations, and goals. These are combined with both intrinsic expectations (how we expect ourselves to progress) and extrinsic expectations (the expectations of family and others) to propel us forward in our personal growth journey.

Reaction Mechanism

In chemistry, a reaction mechanism is the step-by-step sequence of elementary reactions that leads from reactants to products. It’s the detailed path the reaction takes. When we apply this to personal growth, the reaction mechanism is not a single, fixed procedure but a continuous, self-correcting process.

In our campfire analogy, the reaction process is a combustion reaction, the process of combining fuel and oxygen with the activation energy provided by the match or a lighter, to initiate a chemical reaction that produces heat and light as products.

Personal growth is a journey towards a goal or personal transformation, much like a chemical reaction. It involves a methodical process of learning, similar to the scientific method, where knowledge is gained and applied through observation. This leads to the development of strategies, which are then implemented through habits, discipline, and focus to transform effort into skill. Ultimately, this process enables us to identify and conquer obstacles.

Products

We define a product as the desired output of a process, or the desired outcome of success.

In the campfire analogy, the products are heat (thermal energy) and light.

The desired outcome of personal growth is multifaceted, encompassing skills and competencies, such as mastering a trade, or individual definitions of success, like a specific title or salary. Ultimately, however, I would argue, we should strive in the long-term to gain in wisdom.

Byproducts

A campfire’s combustion reaction produces unintended and undesirable byproducts: ashes, which are mineral waste, and smoke, a form of air pollution consisting of uncombusted particles.

Our personal growth journey, unlike a chemical reaction, yields byproducts that can be either positive or negative, depending on the nature of the growth itself. When we engage in what we call “exothermic growth,” our investment of personal energy results in a positive return or outcome. This beneficial growth produces desirable byproducts such as compassion, critical thinking skills, humility, and resiliency.

Conversely, “endothermic growth” occurs when we invest more personal energy than we receive in return. This imbalance can lead to negative, unintended emotional or psychological consequences, including anxiety, burnout, fear, frustration, and stress.

Therefore, self-awareness is crucial. It enables us to identify and prioritize rewarding, exothermic activities while simultaneously recognizing and minimizing endothermic activities that drain our personal energy and are misaligned with our personal goals and ambitions.

Conclusion

In conclusion, just like a well-tended campfire provides warmth and light, a mindful approach to personal growth can yield profound and lasting benefits. By understanding the “chemistry” of our own development—recognizing the needed components, our supplies, reactants, and the crucial role of activation energy and catalysts—we can more effectively guide our journey. Cultivating self-awareness allows us to prioritize “exothermic growth” and minimize the less desirable “endothermic” byproducts, ensuring our personal evolution is not only productive but also sustainable and deeply rewarding.

October 13, 2025
Personal Growth as a Series of Energy Transformations

The Law of Conservation of Energy

Have you ever felt completely drained after a project, even a successful one? Or, conversely, felt energized and alive after tackling a difficult challenge? The reason for this might be found in a fundamental law of the universe: the conservation of energy.

The law of conservation of energy states that energy cannot be created or destroyed; it can only be transformed from one form to another.The principle of conservation of energy absolutely applies to the process of your personal growth. You can’t get energy out without putting energy in.

In our chemical reaction analogy for personal growth, this principle is foundational. It means that the personal energy you have is a finite resource that must be accounted for. It can’t simply disappear.

We can view our personal growth as a series of energy transformations. In this model, you are the most precious resource you have—your personal energy. Personal growth requires an investment of personal energy—your time, effort, focus, and emotional commitment—to initiate and sustain a change. The outcome you get is a direct result of this transformation.

The key to living the life you desire isn’t about finding more energy; it’s about choosing where to invest the energy you have.

Exothermic Personal Growth

An exothermic reaction is one that releases more energy than it takes to get started. Think of a campfire: you invest a small amount of energy to light a match, but the fire then releases a much greater amount of heat and light.

Exothermic personal growth is a process that provides a net gain. In a highly efficient “reaction,” your invested energy is transformed into a net gain of new, positive energy. This is the ideal. It’s a process where your small, intentional investment of personal energy leads to a large and rewarding release of positive energy.

For example, the challenging work of learning a new skill that brings you joy, taking on a difficult but meaningful project, having a deep, honest conversation with your friend. These actions require effort, but the feeling of accomplishment, connection, and confidence you get in return is a powerful surplus. The emotional reward is far greater than the initial effort.

Endothermic Personal Growth

An endothermic reaction is one that absorbs energy from its surroundings. Think of a chemical cold pack: it needs to absorb energy from the environment to become cold. The process leaves the surroundings with less energy. In a draining “reaction,” your energy is transformed into by-products like stress, frustration, and burnout. You put in a great amount of personal energy, but because the process is inefficient or misaligned with your goals, you are left feeling drained and with a net loss of energy.

It’s when you are constantly investing a large amount of personal energy into a process or relationship, with very little emotional or mental energy being returned. This could be staying in a job that makes you miserable for too long, trying to earn the approval of someone who constantly criticizes you, or pursuing a goal out of obligation, not because you’re passionate about it. These are processes that leave you feeling drained. The energy you invest is not returned to you, or the products of the “reaction” aren’t worth the cost.

Key Understanding

In this analogy, you are the “chemist” of your own life. You can’t create more energy, but you can choose where to direct the energy you have. Your goal is to design a life filled with reactions where a small investment of intentional effort yields a significant release of personal energy, making the entire growth process both powerful and sustainable. To identify and pursue the exothermic reactions that fill you up and provide momentum for the next challenge. Just as importantly, you must recognize and minimize the endothermic reactions that drain your most precious resource: your personal energy.

Personal Commentary: The Importance of Self-awareness

I’m a perfect example of how the benefits of exothermic personal growth, such as accomplishment and confidence, can lead to negative outcomes. For much of my life, I have made the most of my God-given intelligence and my ability to grasp and explain complex concepts, gaining recognition and self-confidence. However, as this recognition grew, my self-confidence transformed into arrogance. I stopped recognizing and acknowledging my weaknesses, believing my way the the best or only way and that I no longer needed others’ help. This led me to forge ahead alone, alienating people and ultimately causing my failure. The very processes that were initially energizing became draining, leading to frustration, resentment, and the abandonment of those career paths.

At the time, I blamed others for my setbacks. Now, with age, wisdom, and a new perspective, I realize I was my own worst enemy. This highlights the critical importance of self-awareness in navigating our lives. It shapes our perspective, ensuring we neither waste our energy nor allow positive, personal growth to become a long-term detriment. Self-awareness is the key to developing our action plan, the specific steps and habits we need to follow, the “procedure” in our chemical reaction analogy of personal growth.

September 28, 2025
Step-by-Step Procedure for Personal Growth

The key to a successful analysis or experiment is a detailed procedure to follow. First, it provides a list of all the key starting materials you need to gather, along with the quantities of each. Then step-by-step instructions on how to combine these materials. Then details regarding under what conditions the reaction mechanism drives the reaction process to its completion, resulting in the product or products you desire. A quality procedure also lists the byproducts that a reaction process may produce. And finally, a section on sources of error, a detailed description of possible errors that can be made, and the effect of these mistakes on the reaction process, and which products or byproducts are produced.

I can attest to the fact that writing a quality procedure is a challenging task. I’ve drafted my share of procedures in my career, and I’ve found that it requires extensive hands-on experience performing the chemical reaction process and an in-depth understanding of how each step of the procedure contributes to the overall desired result. More importantly, I found that the sources of error section is the most difficult section to write. Luckily, I was blessed to have college professors whose primary focus was on the documentation of every possible source of error in every experiment we performed and on every lab report we prepared in our advanced chemistry and physics courses.

Commentary

So, how does this concept of a detailed procedure apply in our chemical reaction analogy of personal growth? I can honestly say there were points in my life that I had no idea what I was supposed to do, what decision to make, what path to follow. I wished I had had a detailed procedure to follow, a document that told me what decisions I should make, and when, to obtain the goals, and the success I was seeking. A set of step-by-step instructions defining what skills and traits I needed to possess, and the decisions I needed to make. And more importantly, I could’ve used a sources of error section that identified what mistakes I might make, describing how to, if not avoid them, deal with them constructively and not get sidetracked on my journey.

But, as I have learned and become painfully aware of at times, there is no one universal set of instructions we can follow for personal success. While there are plenty of books written on the subject, not one is universally applicable to each of us, with our individual personality traits, gifts, dreams, and aspirations.

Creating Your Procedure for Personal Growth

You cannot find a procedure tailored personally for you in a blog, book, or video; you produce it. It’s not a set of instructions someone else has written for your life. Instead, you create it with a combination of self-assessment and a growth mindset, the understanding that there is always more you can learn.

Step One: Self-assessment

To begin, you need to develop an awareness of the starting materials component for your personal growth procedure through honest self-assessment – identifying your strengths, weaknesses, motivations, and natural tendencies (how you react in different situations). This is the initial observation stage, much like in the Scientific Method.

Continue to ask yourself: “What have I done in the past that’s worked for me?”, “What approach or actions to address challenges or concerns feels natural to me?”, and “What habits, good and bad, do I tend to fall into?” This self-assessment ensures your approach is personalized and realistic. Following a generic procedure that works for someone else might produce a result in you that leaves you feeling emotionally, mentally, or physically drained.

Remember that this journey is yours, and yours alone.

Step Two: Utilizing a Growth Mindset

Once you’ve identified your core starting materials, turn your attention outward. See how others have achieved similar goals. Dive into books and articles about what you’re interested in. Find mentors who have already done what you want to do, ask for their input, seek their instruction. And, try to learn from their successes and failures. Figure out what works for them and then make it your own.

Perfecting Your Procedure: The Scientific Method

You don’t know what to do at the beginning; you discover it. Your procedure for personal growth is not something you are handed at the beginning of your journey. Instead, your initial procedure is a hypothesis – a best guess based on your self-awareness and research. Through the process of experimentation, analysis, and revision, you refine that hypothesis. The final, tested and proven procedure is the culmination of your observation and learning. It represents the wisdom and practical knowledge you’ve gained from the entire process.

Your “procedure” is not a fixed set of instructions; it is dynamic and constantly changing. As you learn more about yourself and the world around you, your procedure must adapt to who you are and your unique situation at each stage of your personal growth. What works for you today may not be what you need a year from now. Your procedure adapts as you gain new insights, as your world changes, and as your goals evolve.

This is the power of applying the scientific method to your life: you are constantly running small experiments, collecting data on your results, and refining your methods for the next reiteration. It’s a continuous, cyclical process of learning and adaptation. Your journey of personal growth is ever-evolving; each day brings with it new challenges. Personal growth dictates that who we are today is different than who we were yesterday, and hopefully, tomorrow we will be better than we are today.

September 21, 2025
Weekly Quotation: September 17, 2025: The Journey to Wisdom: Life Lessons at Sixty

For your consideration:

“The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.”

– Muhammad Ali

“The only true wisdom is knowing you know nothing.”

– Socrates

Now in my sixties, I often reflect upon the knowledge I have retained, my life experiences – my successes and failures, and the mistakes I have made, wondering how it all fits together. What have I really learned? What has my life up to this moment really taught me? Am I gaining in wisdom or making the same mistakes I’ve made consistently throughout my life?

Wisdom can be defined as the ability to think and act based on knowledge, life experiences, self-awareness, common sense, and insight into the world. It involves making sound decisions and exercising good judgment, an area I personally strive to improve. Now as I grow older, I attempt to focus more on managing complex situations, especially within my family dynamics, and offering thoughtful, considerate advice. This requires actively listening, a skill that is critical in all situations, and only providing my opinion when asked. I also continue to make a conscious effort to learn from every mistake.

For me, wisdom is also deeply connected to my faith. I pray for God’s wisdom, asking for help in being more self-aware, compassionate, and developing a sense of purpose that exceeds simply obtaining material things. Part of this process is the recognition that I am not there yet, there is so much more I need to learn, about myself and my life’s purpose. But I know I am a better person today than I was yesterday, and perhaps that is the beginning of wisdom.

September 17, 2025