Musings of an Old Chemist

A Student’s Guide to Navigating Life, Career, and the Unknown

Tag: procrastination

  • The Essential Role of Gratitude in Personal Growth

    The Essential Role of Gratitude in Personal Growth

    A campfire does not burn forever on its own. Every campfire requires two individual efforts: the initial work to build the campfire’s structure and ignite the flame (provide the “spark”), and the steady, ongoing addition of fuel to keep the fire alive.

    Early in our journey of personal growth, parents, teachers, and mentors serve as the initial spark. They gather the kindling, protect and feed the early flames, and then show us how to build a campfire’s structure that can protect us from the cold. But as we get older and our lives grow busier, we often walk away from the fire they created for us to chase other things: our dreams and ambitions, career paths, seeking a place in the world of our own design. We assume that the campfire they built for us will simply stay burning in our absence. By the time we think to return, wanting to show our gratitude for what they did for us, we so often find only cool ashes where a roaring blaze used to be. We had missed the opportunity to acknowledge and express our thankfulness for that initial spark.

    Visualize expressing gratitude as adding fuel to the campfire and appreciating the light and warmth it provides while it is still burning. It is the deliberate nurturing of the relationships that warmed us along our journey. Ensuring that the light of our personal growth “campfire” stays bright, the connection to our past and the people who have given it so much meaning remains strong, and the lessons and gifts we received along our journey are passed along to the next generation.

    How Gratitude Gets Pushed to the Back Burner

    Life has a way of changing our priorities. Without realizing it, each new year quietly pulls us away from the people who helped us get where we are.   When we’re young, our world is small and focused on the things right in front of us: pleasing our parents, fitting in with friends, and chasing the grades or achievements that prove we’re successful. As we move into adulthood, those who influence us change, but the grind feels the same. We swap family expectations for college classrooms, professors’, mentors’, and bosses’ advice, new careers, and growing family responsibilities.

    Every new stage of our life brings its own unique demands. As our calendars fill up, we react to whatever task, meeting, or family responsibility is loudest. We tell ourselves that as soon as this project wraps up, or as soon as life settles down, we’ll take a breath and catch up with old friends. We live under the fallacy of I’ll do it “next time”, assuming the people who love us, supported us, taught us, and cheered us on will always be waiting for us until we finally have a free moment. 

    But life doesn’t wait for our calendars to clear. Mentors retire, friends drift away, and the loving, supportive people who shaped who we are today age and pass on. We often only slow down to recognize their importance until after life’s rush has passed. That’s when we realize the appointments and the meetings that felt so urgent were just short-lived distractions, and the opportunities to say a simple “thank you” are gone for good. Sometimes we end up showing our gratitude too late, not because we didn’t care, but because we assumed we had more time.

    Gratitude is a Mindset, Not Simply Using Our Manners

    Most of us were taught the basics of manners early on. We learned to say “thank you” when someone passed the salt or handed us a birthday present. But those early lessons address gratitude like a quick reflex, an expected response following a specific interaction. Gratitude is taught as good manners, not as a way of living.

    We tend to forget basic politeness once our life gets busy. When responsibilities pile on, simple manners may be forgotten while our focus shifts entirely to hitting goals and managing daily stress. To reinforce gratitude that actually lasts throughout our busy lives, it has to be shaped as an intentional way of seeing our world and the people within it.

    As children, we tend to notice if our parents take time to send a thoughtful note to an old friend or talk with us about how a friend helped them through a tough time. Through these types of moments, we learn that nobody makes it truly on their own, while many of us think we can and have, and that real strength comes from recognizing the people who helped build the foundation of who we truly are. When showing our gratitude for others and, in turn, recognizing our blessings is a habit rather than a chore, it becomes a daily practice.

    That shift changes our whole personal growth journey. When appreciation and gratitude combine with success, we’re not so arrogant as to believe our achievements are solely due to our efforts alone, and tough times feel far less lonely. Instead of viewing life as a solo race to the finish line, we start noticing the support system holding us up all along.

    Breaking the Cycle

    Changing a lifelong habit of prioritizing our busy schedules takes more than just good intentions. It takes simple, practical modifications to how we handle our day-to-day lives.

    Make a Show Gratitude List

    It’s easy to let daily activities dictate our priorities without noticing. Make an effort right now to stop and ask yourself who has made a significant contribution to who you are at this point in your life. When you realize someone is making or has made a positive difference in your life- a fellow student, an instructor, a coworker, a mentor, or a friend- don’t save that thought for another day. Write a note, text, email, or make a phone call. Let them know how much you appreciate them today.

    Adopt a “Never Delay” Rule

    Whenever you think of someone you’re grateful for, make reaching out something you need to do right away, not a task for later. A quick text sent today means far more than a long letter you plan to write “someday.” Be specific: tell them exactly what they did, how it helped, and why you still remember and appreciate it.

    Pay It Forward

    The best way to honor the people who shaped your life is to become that same positive influence for someone else. Pass along their life lessons, high standards, and expectations, and offer steady encouragement. Then teach the same acts of appreciation and gratitude you were shown to those coming up behind you. Instead of simply remembering the foundation others help build for you, start building that foundation for others.

    Final Thoughts

    When we commit to showing immediate gratitude regardless of what our schedule demands, it stops being something we regret not showing until late in life. Gratitude becomes a daily habit, keeping our relationships with those who made a difference in our lives strong right now and ensuring the people who matter know it while it counts.

  • Overcoming Procrastination: Unlocking Your Activation Energy

    Overcoming Procrastination: Unlocking Your Activation Energy

    Have you ever sat down to study for an exam, write a difficult paper or report, or tackle a massive project, only to feel completely exhausted before you even begin? Staring at a blank screen or a pile of notes on a cluttered desk can feel like a heavy physical weight. You might interpret that feeling as a sign of weakness, that the task is impossibly hard, or that you simply lack the drive or ability to complete the task successfully. In our campfire example, you are facing a fundamental chemistry concept known as activation energy, the energy needed to initiate a reaction or process.

    The “Spark” That Initiates a Reaction

    Before a fire can burn, or a chemical reaction can release its energy, it requires an initial spark. You can build a perfect campfire with its dry wood, tinder, and plenty of oxygen, but it will sit there forever doing nothing until you strike the first match. That “spark” provides the activation energy: the absolute minimum amount of energy required to disrupt the state of the current situation and get things moving. In chemistry, this is often described as a steep energy “hill” that molecules must climb before they can react. Once they cross the crest of that hill, they roll down the other side, colliding and generating a reaction. Imagine trying to dissolve sugar in a glass of iced tea. You have to add energy by stirring in order to start breaking the chemical bonds in the sugar molecule to initiate the “dissolving” process.

    The Procrastination Barrier

    This physical law perfectly describes why we procrastinate, why we stay stuck in a nonrewarding job, and why we resist building new habits. The hardest part of any challenge, whether it is changing jobs or career paths, repairing a strained relationship, or sitting down to solve a complex problem, is almost always overcoming that initial act of procrastination. That mental resistance you feel isn’t a lack of ability. It is just the activation energy barrier. The barrier doesn’t mean the task is impossible; it just means the very beginning requires a concentrated, intentional burst of your energy.

    Once you push your effort over that initial hill, the process begins to generate its own momentum. Just like a campfire catching a log on fire, your effort becomes an exothermic (heat-releasing), self-sustaining reaction. Suddenly, the steps to complete a project become clearer, the words for a report or, in my case, a manuscript, start flowing, and the work doesn’t feel so overwhelming anymore.

    Overcoming the Initial Energy Barrier

    To be successful, in the classroom, the boardroom, or at home, you have to learn how to find and manage your activation energy. Here are four steps you can try to help you overcome your initial resistance to starting the task at hand.

    1. Identify the Energy Barrier
      1. The Boulder on the Hill Analogy: In chemistry, activation energy is like pushing a heavy boulder up a hill before it can roll down the other side on its own. What is a “boulder” you are currently avoiding pushing? Write down exactly what the top of the hill looks like (the moment the task finally gets easier).
      2. Name Your Resistance: What is squelching your activation energy? Fear of failure, perfectionism, or simply feeling overwhelmed by the sheer size of a project? Identify your biggest obstacle and describe how it actually feels when you stare at that untouched task.
    2. Reduce the Energy Barrier
      1. Chopping the Wood: When building a campfire, you cannot light a massive log with a single paper match; you have to chop it into kindling first. Take one intimidating project currently on your plate and break it down into manageable steps. What are the three smallest steps you can take today?
      2. Be Your Own Catalyst: In the lab, a catalyst is a substance that lowers the activation energy needed for a reaction to happen. Who or what is a catalyst for your situation? This may be moving to a quiet place, free of distractions, to study or work; blocking off time on your calendar; setting aside one time block a day to focus on the task at hand; or teaming up with a friend, coworker, or study partner who will hold you accountable. Which catalyst will you employ this week?
    3. Generate the Spark
      1. The 5-Minute Rule: The act of striking a match only lasts a second. Commit to doing your most dreaded task for exactly 5 minutes, just enough to create a “spark.” Give yourself permission to stop after 5 minutes if you want. Notice how you feel after those 5 minutes are up. Did a “fire” catch? Did you gain a new perspective on your ability to complete the task successfully?
      2. Striking the Match: We often wait around for inspiration to strike, but in reality, action creates the spark. What is one small, physical action you can take right now to create friction and start your momentum? For me, it’s setting my alarm on my phone to get up one hour earlier each morning, then setting a one-hour timer on my computer screen, focusing all my efforts on writing for that amount of time with no distractions.
    4. Recognize the Reaction (Exothermic Growth)
      1. The Heat Release: Once a campfire catches, it gives off warmth and light. Think of a time you finally started a difficult task and felt that wave of relief when you discovered it was not as difficult as you initially thought and you could accomplish it. Describe that feeling. How can remembering that satisfaction help you start the ball rolling the next time you face a tough task?

    Final Thoughts

    It is important that we understand activation energy and how the concept applies in our process of personal growth. So very often we let our emotions, the fear and self-doubt, affect how we approach our day-to-day living. Because we have either too little self-confidence or, in some cases, too much self-confidence, we procrastinate, either never attempting to complete an assigned task or, worse, because we’re overconfident, never giving the task our best effort, assuming we only need to do just good enough and feel that is all the effort required for the best result. Knowing ourselves (self-awareness) is key to making positive change in our lives and how we address new challenges.

  • Mastering STEM: 3 Keys to Success Beyond ‘Natural Genius’

    Mastering STEM: 3 Keys to Success Beyond ‘Natural Genius’

    There’s a persistent myth in Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM): that success belongs to the “natural genius,” the person who just “gets it.”

    Here’s the truth: Achieving mastery in challenging STEM fields has little to do with some magical, intrinsic gift. It is 100% based on the application of several advanced intellectual and behavioral strategies. Think of it as a complete operating system upgrade for your brain.

    To move beyond the daily struggles and achieve genuine mastery in STEM, you need to commit to these three non-negotiable principles.

    The Power of Modeling

    Social Learning Theory, pioneered by Albert Bandura, shows that a huge part of human learning happens through observing and imitating others. But success isn’t about emulation (or copying) a single skill; it’s about modeling a complete system.

    To succeed, you must actively observe and adopt the entire package of skills and habits from those who have already achieved high levels of success. For example:

    • Advanced Technical Skills: How do experts and mentors break down a complex problem? Learn their analytical approaches.
    • Powerful Work Ethic: Look at how they meticulously structure their study schedules, their uncompromising standards for quality, and their consistent effort.
    • Powerful, Positive Mindset: How do they view failure? It’s purely objective, instructive data—nothing more.

    Take action, stop focusing solely on the textbook content. Start noting the process of your most successful peers or mentors. How do they organize? When and how do they study? How do they handle a major setback? You want to copy and implement a system, not just learn content knowledge.

    Escaping the “Developmental Trap.”

    A massive barrier to our progress is what is called the “developmental trap.” This is when you inadvertently become rooted in ineffective behavioral patterns that feel comfortable but sabotage your future.

    Are you chronically procrastinating? Do you find fault in everything you do, seeing only the negative outcomes, which paralyzes you from even starting? Are you habitually unclear about your goals and intentions, or vague in your communication with your fellow students/teachers/professors? These are self-sabotaging habits.

    To break free, you must perform a conscious, honest self-assessment and start developing and exercising your self-awareness skills.

    Follow-up on your self-assessment by:

    • Installing these productive habits: Resilience (bouncing back from setbacks with renewed effort) and a rigorous work ethic (getting things done with uncompromising quality and efficiency).
    • Discard low-return behaviors: Self-incrimination, self-doubt, and negativity.

    Over time, your relentless effort will help create a powerful “internal compass.” Your motivation shifts from the temporary need for external validation (a good grade, a compliment) to an intrinsic drive—a non-negotiable, standard you’ve set for quality and thoroughness that you must meet, regardless of what anyone else thinks.

    Prioritize the Process Over the Score

    The final, and perhaps most crucial, mental adjustment is letting go of the destructive notion that you must achieve absolute, flaw-free perfection. That ideal is unattainable and will only lead to burnout.

    The successful STEM student must value the process of learning and discovery over the final numerical score or grade.

    When an experiment fails, a line of code breaks, or you get a subpar result on a quiz, how you react must change. Don’t view it as a “mess-up” or that you don’t have what it takes to “make it.” Instead, you must treat it as a starting point from which you learn and progress.

    This data is essential for:

    1. Precisely identifying your weaknesses.
    2. Fine-tuning your approach to solving the problem or issue.
    3. Educating you for the design of your future, a more refined attempt.

    This mental shift is life-changing. It moves your focus from avoiding mistakes (a fear-based approach) to maximizing learning effectiveness (a growth-based approach.)

    Summary

    In the demanding world of STEM, setbacks—from experimental failures to complex problem-solving roadblocks and challenging coursework—are a daily certainty. Therefore, the single most critical factor for your long-term success and ultimate perseverance is your ability to effectively manage and recalibrate your expectations.

    Really successful STEM students ditch the idea that they have to be absolutely perfect. They focus more on consistently putting in the hard work and sticking closely to the process (understanding the “why” and the “how”), instead of getting hung up on immediate, flawless results. This mindset change is a huge win: it means they stop seeing mistakes as a huge personal flaw and start seeing them as valuable, objective data—the stuff you need for real learning, figuring out new strategies, and improving down the line. In the end, this shift turns anxiety into a powerful tool for growth.